It's Not Easy Being Wintergreen

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wintergreen48
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It's Not Easy Being Wintergreen

#1 Post by wintergreen48 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:28 am

One of the benefits to being a jobless loser is that I can go to the gym whenever I want. I went there first thing this morning.

When I got there, I realized that I had to drain the snake, so I headed first to the men's room. Just as I got there, a guy came up to use the next urinal; we spent some time counting the tiles above our respective urinals. He finished before I did (unstrapping it and then restrapping it to my knee takes a long time). When I finished my business and went over to the sink, I saw that the other guy was already there: he was leaning up against the sink, with his johnson hanging over the edge, washing the head.

Key West offered much more pleasant sights.

I found another sink.

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Rexer25
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#2 Post by Rexer25 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:32 am

It's not easy being Wintergreen? Just imagine all the hangups that guy has about his toilet training.
Enough already. It's my fault! Get over it!

That'll be $10, please.

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tlynn78
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#3 Post by tlynn78 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:33 am

Well, cleanliness is next to, .. something.

did he have a wide stance?


t.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. -Thomas Paine
You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. -Ayn Rand
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire

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christie1111
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#4 Post by christie1111 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:34 am

Okay, so this is something I can say that I really didn't expect to read this morning.

:roll:
"A bed without a quilt is like the sky without stars"

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peacock2121
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#5 Post by peacock2121 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:35 am

Excuse me while my eyeballs bleed from trying to scratch that visual out of my retinas.

The director's cut had me poking through my optic nerve.

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Four Hour Stiffy
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#6 Post by Four Hour Stiffy » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:37 am

Hey, you've got to clean your tools if you want them to always be in good working order....
BOOOIIIIIINNNGGGGG!!!!!

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gsabc
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#7 Post by gsabc » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:43 am

Geez, fella, if you've gotta keep it that clean, bring a wet wipe or something. That's just rude, besides being unpleasant for others using the facility.

At least the image will help keep me on my diet.
I just ordered chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

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#8 Post by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:45 am

christie1111 wrote:Okay, so this is something I can say that I really didn't expect to read this morning.

:roll:
Ditto for me!

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Bob Juch
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#9 Post by Bob Juch » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:53 am

Is it possible he was a Muslim?
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
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Si fractum non sit, noli id reficere.

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themanintheseersuckersuit
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#10 Post by themanintheseersuckersuit » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:54 am

We've been wondering where Mr. Constanza had moved his Health Club membership.




http://www.tbs.com/stories/story/0,,69148,00.html
Suitguy is not bitter.

feels he represents the many educated and rational onlookers who believe that the hysterical denouncement of lay scepticism is both unwarranted and counter-productive

The problem, then, is that such calls do not address an opposition audience so much as they signal virtue. They talk past those who need convincing. They ignore actual facts and counterargument. And they are irreparably smug.

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#11 Post by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:59 am

themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:We've been wondering where Mr. Constanza had moved his Health Club membership.




http://www.tbs.com/stories/story/0,,69148,00.html
But if you urinate in the shower, wouldn't it make more sense to wash in the shower, rather than in a sink.

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themanintheseersuckersuit
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#12 Post by themanintheseersuckersuit » Thu Apr 17, 2008 10:03 am

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:We've been wondering where Mr. Constanza had moved his Health Club membership.




http://www.tbs.com/stories/story/0,,69148,00.html
But if you urinate in the shower, wouldn't it make more sense to wash in the shower, rather than in a sink.
[georgeconstanza] Jeez, first they throw me out for peeing in the shower and when I try to do better all I get is more abuse, what's a guy to do? [/gc]
Suitguy is not bitter.

feels he represents the many educated and rational onlookers who believe that the hysterical denouncement of lay scepticism is both unwarranted and counter-productive

The problem, then, is that such calls do not address an opposition audience so much as they signal virtue. They talk past those who need convincing. They ignore actual facts and counterargument. And they are irreparably smug.

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#13 Post by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Thu Apr 17, 2008 10:17 am

themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:We've been wondering where Mr. Constanza had moved his Health Club membership.




http://www.tbs.com/stories/story/0,,69148,00.html
But if you urinate in the shower, wouldn't it make more sense to wash in the shower, rather than in a sink.

[georgeconstanza] Jeez, first they throw me out for peeing in the shower and when I try to do better all I get is more abuse, what's a guy to do? [/gc]
Obviously I don't understand proper penis etiquette.

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themanintheseersuckersuit
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#14 Post by themanintheseersuckersuit » Thu Apr 17, 2008 10:21 am

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
Obviously I don't understand proper penis etiquette.
ya know, if anything on the planet ought to come with an owner's manual, this is probably it, but sadly they do not. But then guys are not know known for reading the instructions.
Suitguy is not bitter.

feels he represents the many educated and rational onlookers who believe that the hysterical denouncement of lay scepticism is both unwarranted and counter-productive

The problem, then, is that such calls do not address an opposition audience so much as they signal virtue. They talk past those who need convincing. They ignore actual facts and counterargument. And they are irreparably smug.

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DevilKitty100
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Re: It's Not Easy Being Wintergreen

#15 Post by DevilKitty100 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 10:41 am

wintergreen48 wrote:When I finished my business and went over to the sink, I saw that the other guy was already there: he was leaning up against the sink, with his johnson hanging over the edge, washing the head.

I found another sink.
Did you ask him if he took the dishes out of the sink before he did that at home?

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peacock2121
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Re: It's Not Easy Being Wintergreen

#16 Post by peacock2121 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 10:50 am

DevilKitty100 wrote:
wintergreen48 wrote:When I finished my business and went over to the sink, I saw that the other guy was already there: he was leaning up against the sink, with his johnson hanging over the edge, washing the head.

I found another sink.
Did you ask him if he took the dishes out of the sink before he did that at home?
Made me laugh.

I then saw wintergreen asking him that and that awful previous image is out of my eyeballs.

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#17 Post by Beebs52 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:07 pm

A cornucopia of inspiring items today.

Reading Wintergreen's description, in all its matter of fact glory, made my ears bleed a little.
Well, then

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tlynn78
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#18 Post by tlynn78 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:14 pm

Speaking of Johnson, I just got this note from my boss:

T,

Please Mr. Johnson.

R.


Hmm. I thnk I'll assume he simply forgot to write in the word "call."

made me lol, though.


t.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. -Thomas Paine
You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. -Ayn Rand
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire

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#19 Post by LarryCraig » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:33 pm

tlynn78 wrote:Well, cleanliness is next to, .. something.

did he have a wide stance?


t.
I swear to God I was nowhere near wintergreen or that restroom!
Who Wants to Eat a Super Tuber?

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Chronic Diarrhea
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#20 Post by Chronic Diarrhea » Thu Apr 17, 2008 12:42 pm

LarryCraig wrote:
tlynn78 wrote:Well, cleanliness is next to, .. something.

did he have a wide stance?


t.
I swear to God I was nowhere near wintergreen or that restroom!

You should just stay locked in the stall like I do. Not that I have much choice..... Ooooohhhhhh......

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Tocqueville3
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#21 Post by Tocqueville3 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 1:21 pm

Elaine- It shrinks?
George- Like a freightened turtle.
Elaine- I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.

On a related note...there is an older guy in our choir whose name is Dick Johnson. I kid you not. He's a retired physican. I like to call him Dr. Johnson cuz calling him Dick and thinking his last name is Johnson makes me break into hysterical laughter inside.

Wait until travis sees this thread. Who knows...mebbe that was him washing his dingdong in the sink.

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Re: It's Not Easy Being Wintergreen

#22 Post by tanstaafl2 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:01 pm

Somehow the avatar and the content of this post seem oddly incongruent.

Hmm.
wintergreen48 wrote:One of the benefits to being a jobless loser is that I can go to the gym whenever I want. I went there first thing this morning.

When I got there, I realized that I had to drain the snake, so I headed first to the men's room. Just as I got there, a guy came up to use the next urinal; we spent some time counting the tiles above our respective urinals. He finished before I did (unstrapping it and then restrapping it to my knee takes a long time). When I finished my business and went over to the sink, I saw that the other guy was already there: he was leaning up against the sink, with his johnson hanging over the edge, washing the head.

Key West offered much more pleasant sights.

I found another sink.
If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.
~Mark Twain

Some people are like a Slinky. They are not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs...
~tanstaafl2

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Ne Illegitimi Carborundum
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CharlesFoxSingers
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Will this thread ever peter out?

#23 Post by CharlesFoxSingers » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:08 pm

When I was a little biddy boy
My grandma bought me a cute little toy
Two Silver bells on a string
She told me it was my ding-a-ling-a-ling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling

When I was little boy In Grammar school
Always went by the very best rule
But Evertime the bell would ring
You'd catch me playing with my ding-a-ling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling

Once while climbing the garden wall,
Slipped and fell had a very bad fall
I fell so hard I heard birds sing,
But I held on to My ding-a-ling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling

Once while swimming cross turtle creek
Man them snappers right at my feet
Sure was hard swimming cross that thing
with both hands holding my dingaling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling

Now this here song it ain't so bad
Prettiest little song that you ever had
And those of you who will not sing
must be playing with your on Ding-a-ling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won't you play with My Ding-A-Ling

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#24 Post by T_Bone0806 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 2:48 pm

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote: But if you urinate in the shower, wouldn't it make more sense to wash in the shower, rather than in a sink.

[georgeconstanza] Jeez, first they throw me out for peeing in the shower and when I try to do better all I get is more abuse, what's a guy to do? [/gc]
Obviously I don't understand proper penis etiquette.
This conjured up thoughts of holding it with pinky extended and always standing up when a lady enters the room, which I banished from my mind by thinking of last night's baseball scores.
"#$%&@*&"-Donald F. Duck

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Beebs52
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#25 Post by Beebs52 » Thu Apr 17, 2008 4:01 pm

T_Bone0806 wrote:
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:
[georgeconstanza] Jeez, first they throw me out for peeing in the shower and when I try to do better all I get is more abuse, what's a guy to do? [/gc]
Obviously I don't understand proper penis etiquette.
This conjured up thoughts of holding it with pinky extended and always standing up when a lady enters the room, which I banished from my mind by thinking of last night's baseball scores.
Um, it's hard to stifle wheezing laughter at one's desk while trying to appear normal.

As long as you don't hold "pinky" extended while standing. On a corner or something.
Well, then

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