Job Opportunity I Just Received - Hope I'm Qualified

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wintergreen48
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Job Opportunity I Just Received - Hope I'm Qualified

#1 Post by wintergreen48 » Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:12 pm

Do you enjoy working outdoors? Looking to make extra cash AND work a convenient schedule? If so, we want to talk to YOU!

Headway Corporate Resources has immediate need for Parking Lot Attendants to work with our client, a leading construction company specializing in residential, industrial and commercial design building and renovations.

As a Parking Lot Attendant, you will be responsible for scanning badges of employees and visitors, signing ledgers, issuing visitor passes, and
communicating and notifying office staff of incoming visitors using a walkie talkie.

Positions available immediately. Great hourly wage!

For immediate consideration, forward your resume to ccarpenter@headwaycorp.com
or apply online at www.headwaycorp.com/jobs

EEO/AA/M/F/V/D


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Headway Corporate Resources
410 St. Andrews Street
Tarboro, NC 27886



Wowsers! A walkie-talkie and everything!!!

I hope that my resume is up to snuff...

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tlynn78
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#2 Post by tlynn78 » Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:14 pm

That walkie-talkie would prolly make your butt look good.


t.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. -Thomas Paine
You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. -Ayn Rand
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire

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ulysses5019
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#3 Post by ulysses5019 » Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:47 pm

tlynn78 wrote:That walkie-talkie would prolly make your butt look good.


t.


He needs one of those where he can talk to the cuff on his shirt or the epaulets on his shoulder.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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kayrharris
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#4 Post by kayrharris » Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:52 pm

ulysses5019 wrote:
tlynn78 wrote:That walkie-talkie would prolly make your butt look good.


t.


He needs one of those where he can talk to the cuff on his shirt or the epaulets on his shoulder.
Those are cool, but they do nothing for your butt.
"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest. "
Benjamin Franklin

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Beebs52
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#5 Post by Beebs52 » Tue Aug 26, 2008 9:58 pm

No one has ever offered me a walkie talkie opportunity.

I'm devastated.
Well, then

admanvii
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#6 Post by admanvii » Tue Aug 26, 2008 10:00 pm

I'm kinda like a two can and string guy

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PlacentiaSoccerMom
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#7 Post by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Tue Aug 26, 2008 10:57 pm

I wonder if the job comes with insurance and a pension plan.

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AnnieCamaro
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#8 Post by AnnieCamaro » Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:00 pm

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I wonder if the job comes with insurance and a pension plan.
The job comes with some perks -- a guaranteed parking place, for example.

/:P\
Sou iu koto de.

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ulysses5019
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#9 Post by ulysses5019 » Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:03 pm

AnnieCamaro wrote:
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I wonder if the job comes with insurance and a pension plan.
The job comes with some perks -- a guaranteed parking place, for example.

/:P\
And that butt slimming walkie talkie.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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PlacentiaSoccerMom
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Re: Job Opportunity I Just Received - Hope I'm Qualified

#10 Post by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:08 pm

wintergreen48 wrote: As a Parking Lot Attendant, you will be responsible for scanning badges of employees and visitors, signing ledgers, issuing visitor passes, and
communicating and notifying office staff of incoming visitors using a walkie talkie.
There are some people who might apply for the job just to use a walkie talkie.

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jaybee
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#11 Post by jaybee » Wed Aug 27, 2008 6:31 am

What they don't tell you is that nobody has a matching walkie-talkie.

It's just there for butt-flash.
Jaybee

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Cart Pusher
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#12 Post by Cart Pusher » Wed Aug 27, 2008 6:52 am

Sounds great! Too bad I don't have a computer to apply...
'Scuse me, coming through!

[######################/¯
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ulysses5019
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#13 Post by ulysses5019 » Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:09 am

Cart Pusher wrote:Sounds great! Too bad I don't have a computer to apply...
hey, cart pusher, you might think of laying of the walkie talkies.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

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Cart Pusher
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#14 Post by Cart Pusher » Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:13 am

ulysses5019 wrote:
Cart Pusher wrote:Sounds great! Too bad I don't have a computer to apply...
hey, cart pusher, you might think of laying of the walkie talkies.

I don't have a walkie talkie. If the manager wants me to do something, he comes outside and yells at me from across the parking lot.

Is that ghostjmf's car there? I wonder how big of a dent I can put in it with a 15 cart train.....?
'Scuse me, coming through!

[######################/¯
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themanintheseersuckersuit
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#15 Post by themanintheseersuckersuit » Wed Aug 27, 2008 8:55 am

Is immigration enforcement beginning to work?
Suitguy is not bitter.

feels he represents the many educated and rational onlookers who believe that the hysterical denouncement of lay scepticism is both unwarranted and counter-productive

The problem, then, is that such calls do not address an opposition audience so much as they signal virtue. They talk past those who need convincing. They ignore actual facts and counterargument. And they are irreparably smug.

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MarleysGh0st
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#16 Post by MarleysGh0st » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:01 am

themanintheseersuckersuit wrote:Is immigration enforcement beginning to work?
Why do you ask?

Just because some company is spamming about the "great hourly wage" they're offering for parking lot attendants? :P

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JeanieWho
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#17 Post by JeanieWho » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:20 am

Okay, I figured out that an MM is a Merry Man, but what's a Merry Man? And are there Merry Women?

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NellyLunatic1980
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#18 Post by NellyLunatic1980 » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:23 am

JeanieWho wrote:Okay, I figured out that an MM is a Merry Man, but what's a Merry Man? And are there Merry Women?
Merry Men are aliases that many of us create to make humorous posts. There are no Merry Women, per se. All of the female aliases are still refered to as Merry Men.

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Giant Gambian Rat
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#19 Post by Giant Gambian Rat » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:26 am

You don't even have to be human to be a Merry Man.
Have you had your monkeypox shots yet?

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JeanieWho
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#20 Post by JeanieWho » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:28 am

NellyLunatic1980 wrote:
JeanieWho wrote:Okay, I figured out that an MM is a Merry Man, but what's a Merry Man? And are there Merry Women?
Merry Men are aliases that many of us create to make humorous posts. There are no Merry Women, per se. All of the female aliases are still refered to as Merry Men.
Thanks, Nelly! One more mystery solved!

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NellyLunatic1980
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#21 Post by NellyLunatic1980 » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:32 am

Giant Gambian Rat wrote:You don't even have to be human to be a Merry Man.
Exactly right. In fact, some of Merry Men aren't even living organisms. Just look at "Dead Fern", "Dead Horse", or the infamous "Nigerian Penis Pills".

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gsabc
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#22 Post by gsabc » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:34 am

jaybee wrote:What they don't tell you is that nobody has a matching walkie-talkie.

It's just there for butt-flash.
I thought that was called mooning and flashing was showing the other side of the butt.
I just ordered chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

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ulysses5019
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#23 Post by ulysses5019 » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:35 am

JeanieWho wrote:
NellyLunatic1980 wrote:
JeanieWho wrote:Okay, I figured out that an MM is a Merry Man, but what's a Merry Man? And are there Merry Women?
Merry Men are aliases that many of us create to make humorous posts. There are no Merry Women, per se. All of the female aliases are still refered to as Merry Men.
Thanks, Nelly! One more mystery solved!
And it is my Sisyphean task to post as many different avatars as there are MMs.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.

Lame Excuse
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#24 Post by Lame Excuse » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:37 am

NellyLunatic1980 wrote:
Giant Gambian Rat wrote:You don't even have to be human to be a Merry Man.
Exactly right. In fact, some of Merry Men aren't even living organisms. Just look at "Dead Fern", "Dead Horse", or the infamous "Nigerian Penis Pills".
Or even me!

I would have been here sooner, except there was a wreck on the bypass...
It was my brother who did it!

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MarleysGh0st
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#25 Post by MarleysGh0st » Wed Aug 27, 2008 9:38 am

ulysses5019 wrote:
JeanieWho wrote:
NellyLunatic1980 wrote: Merry Men are aliases that many of us create to make humorous posts. There are no Merry Women, per se. All of the female aliases are still refered to as Merry Men.
Thanks, Nelly! One more mystery solved!
And it is my Sisyphean task to post as many different avatars as there are MMs.
Future Bored Historians are going to have a heck of a mess making sense of all the comments that refer to long-long avatars of yours, uly!

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