Haven't heard from the FBI in a while

[kayrharris]

but old Kent is looking for me and my "rap sheet"!!! I love the incomplete sentences, bad grammar, and
lack of punctuation in a lot of places.




Anti-Terrorist and Monetary Crimes Division
Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI)
FBI Headquarters, J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue, NW
Washington, D.C. 20535-0001
Website: http://www.fbi.gov


Attention Beneficiary,

This is an official advice from the FBI foreign Remittance/telegraphic department. It has come to our notice that the Central Bank of Nigeria has released 10,500,000.00 US dollars into bank of America in your name as the beneficiary being for overdue contract payment.

The Central Bank of Nigeria knowing fully well that they do not have enough facilities to effect this payment to your account, so they used what is known as secret diplomatic transit payment (S.T.D.P) to pay this fund through wire transfer in order to complete this payment. They are still waiting for confirmation from you on the available Transferred funds which were made in direct transfer so that they can do final crediting to your account. Records which we have with this method of payment in the past has always been related to terrorist acts, we do not want you to get into trouble as soon as these funds reflect in your account in the U.S.A. So it is our duty as a worldwide commission to correct this little problem before this fund will be credited into your personal account. Due to the increased difficulty and unnecessary security by the American authorities when funds come from Europe and the Middle East, the FBI bank commission stopped the tran! sfer on its way to deliver payment

We have decided to contact you directly to acquire the proper Verifications and proof from you to show that you are the rightful person to receive this fund, because of the amount involve. Note that the fund is in your name with BANK OF AMERICA, but we ask them not to credit the fund to you yet, because we need a solid proof and Verifications from you before releasing the funds. In this regards, you are to re-assure and proof to us that what you are about to receive is a clean money by sending to us Diplomatic Immunity Seal Of Transfer (DIST) to satisfy to us that the money you are about to receive is legitimate. You are to forward the document to us immediately if you have it in your possession, if you don't have it let us know so that we will direct and inform you where to obtain the document and send to us so that we would ask Bank Of America to go ahead and release the money to you without any further delay. This Document is to be issued to you ! from the fund originating country.

An FBI Identification Record and Diplomatic Immunity Seal of Transfer (DIST) often referred to as a Criminal History. Record or Rap Sheet is a listing of certain information taken from fingerprint submissions retained by the FBI in connection with arrests and, in some instances, federal employment, naturalization, or military service. This Condition Is Valid until 31st of March, 2009. After that, we shall take actions on canceling the payment and then charge you for illegal funds transfer from Nigerian government.


NOTE: We have asked for the above documents to make available the most complete and up-to date records possible for the enhancement of public safety, welfare and security of Society while recognizing the importance of individual privacy rights. If you fail to provide the Documents to us, we will charge you with the FBI and take our proper action against you for not proofing to us the legitimate of the fund you are about to receive. The United States Department of Justice Order 556-73 establishes rules and regulations for the subject of an FBI Identification Record to obtain a copy of his or her own Record for review. The FBI Criminal Justice Information Services (CJIS) Division processes these requests to check illegal activities in U.S.A

We await for your prompt response.

Regards,

KENT MORGAN
FBI AGENT

[SportsFan68]

Good grief!

Now they're paying for STDs! I mean, STDPs.

[Thousandaire]

I got an email like that, and they offered me 40% of the proceeds. 40%! Fools. I wouldn't take less than 75%. What, do they think I was born yesterday?

[sunflower]

At least this one sounded like it was written by someone who understands English. Not like the ones that come from the FBI or other agencies, with all the grammatical errors! I think it might be legit...lol

[MarleysGh0st]

Due to the increased difficulty and unnecessary security by the American authorities when funds come from Europe and the Middle East, the FBI bank commission stopped the tran! sfer on its way to deliver payment

The FBI is saying that the American authorities are taking unnecessary security measures? Aren't they American authorities?

The threat about charging you for illegal funds transfer is a nice touch!

[Bob Juch]

I haven't heard from them in a while either; don't tell them where I am!

[Sisyphean Fan]

Why does everybody else always get interesting spam and I'm stuck with replica watches (if anybody needs a Rolexxxxx, I can hook you up!), prescription drugs without a pharmacy and problems with my "Amazon orders".

[littlebeast13]

Why does everybody else always get interesting spam and I'm stuck with replica watches (if anybody needs a Rolexxxxx, I can hook you up!), prescription drugs without a pharmacy and problems with my "Amazon orders".

I don't get spam at all. Even they don't like me.....

lb13

[SportsFan68]

Why does everybody else always get interesting spam and I'm stuck with replica watches (if anybody needs a Rolexxxxx, I can hook you up!), prescription drugs without a pharmacy and problems with my "Amazon orders".

I don't get spam at all. Even they don't like me.....

lb13

It's not you they don't like, LB . . .

It's that mangy roommate . . .