Margy's dad

[ToLiveIsToFly]

He had surgery for colon cancer 2 1/2 years ago, and has been cancer-free ever since. His colonoscopy late last year turned up a polyp, and he got really worried.

The polyp turned out to be benign, but they needed to take it out anyway. Couldn't do it laparascopically (sp?) like last time; something to do with the polyp being right near the scar tissue from the last surgery.

Margy is one of 4, but the only one who's healthy and unemployed. The 3 of us drove out here over the weekend - Margy to be with her dad and take care of Frankie, me to work (my job is incredibly portable).

Surgery was Tuesday. Initially it went well, but his blood pressure (which was never high before) was too high afterwards, all the way through to today. They made the decision to move him to ICU this morning, but there were people who needed it more and he didn't get in until tonight.

Margy called at about six to say she was spending the night with her Dad and that she was sending Frankie home with his aunt. And that her phone was dying.

I finally figured out how to reach her through hospital phone system. They think he had a heart attack (I don't get how they can not be sure, but I didn't press her).

Tonight's the first night of Frankie's life he's going to spend without his Mommy by his side. I'm stunned that he went down to sleep so easily. Hopefully it will be just as easy the 3-4 times he wakes up in the night.

[kayrharris]

Good wishes for Margy, her dad, Frankie and you! Frankie will be fine. He's about the same
age as Chapman. As long as Chapman is getting attention, he's not real picky who gives it
to him. Since you're his dad, I have a feeling he'll be OK.

I hope everyone makes it just fine. Sometimes these routine things turn out not to be so routine.
I hope your father-in-law has not had a heart attack and that he recovers quickly and completely.

[mellytu74]

Prayers for Margy's dad and all of you.

[Tocqueville3]

Praying for Margy's dad.

Frankie will be just fine. That must be really hard for Margy and you. Kids are so resilient, though.

[Catfish]

I'll keep you all in my thoughts and prayers.
Love,

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Thanks all. Margy's phone is dead and I'm sure she's asleep anyway. So I won't know anything until tomorrow.

[peacock2121]

Margy's dad and his doctors are in my thoughts.

[Appa23]

Sorry to hear about your FIL. Surviving a "heart attack" scare can be a positive motivator for life changes. At least, it was for my father.

You also got me trying to remember when my daughter began sleeping through the night.

[tlynn78]

Good thoughts and prayers.


t.

[christie1111]

How'd things go sleep-wise last night?

Any news?

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Frankie slept well last night. Woke up every couple hours, crawled around for a few seconds and picked out a new place to sprawl out. I swear he takes as much bed space as three fully-grown adults.

I didn't. I wish I knew what was keeping me up - I think it was the fear of Frankie waking up in the middle of the night and realizing Mommy was gone and throwing a fit.

Margy was up all night with her dad. He was all kinds of paranoid all night - didn't recognize Margy most of the time, convinced there were people under the bed grabbing at his legs and that the doctors and nurses were trying to kill him. They still don't know if he had a heart attack or not. He's more coherent today, but the docs aren't telling us much of anything. His BP was 209/80 when I was in there, but it was immediately after they put in a PICC line, so maybe that's got something to do with it. I still have to think he'll be his usual cantankerous self by the end of the weekend, and will do nothing but complain the rest of the 10-day stay until he poops and they let him go home.

I'm trying to decide whether to go back to Chicago by myself this weekend (which was the original plan) or to stick around another week. Margy and Frankie will be here until he's discharged.

Margy's sister got here today, so hopefully she'll come home and get some sleep soon.

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Oh. And anybody who's old enough that they should be getting them, get your colonoscopies regular like you should. If he hadn't, he wouldn't be around to have any of this happen.

[kayrharris]

I know Margy is exhausted. Frankie, I'm sure, is fresh as a daisy. All babies move around like crazy
when they sleep. They don't just turn over, they literally turn all the way around and move from one
end of their bed to the other. It's amazing.

Surely with today's technology you'll know if he's had a heart attack or not. I would think that would be
important to know. I hope he continues to improve and will be home soon.

[gsabc]

Oh. And anybody who's old enough that they should be getting them, get your colonoscopies regular like you should. If he hadn't, he wouldn't be around to have any of this happen.

I'm still trying to convince GW of this. With no family history of colon cancer and her long-standing dislike of doctors, though, she's resisting in a big way. My needing three times to get a complete viewing didn't help.

[Appa23]

Did you have Frankie in bed with you? (Might explain the sleeplessness)

[you mentioned how much bed space that he takes up]

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Did you have Frankie in bed with you? (Might explain the sleeplessness)

[you mentioned how much bed space that he takes up]

I did. Mommy is able to put him in the crib without waking him up. Me, not so much.

[secondchance]

Sending best wishes and healing thoughts.

That kid is a cutie.

[marriedmefliesfree]

Did you have Frankie in bed with you? (Might explain the sleeplessness)

[you mentioned how much bed space that he takes up]

I did. Mommy is able to put him in the crib without waking him up. Me, not so much.

Sharing the bed might help him deal better with mom not being there. We 'co-sleep' about half the night or a bit less depending on how long her first stretch of sleep is. And yeah, babies do take up a lot of room in the bed! We woke up a few nights ago with her head buried in my shoulder and her butt planted right in front of dad's face!

Warm thoughts to Margy and your family...and hoping for long peaceful sleeps for you and the little one.

[hermillion]

Prayers and good thoughts headed out for the extended ToFly family. I'm sure the not knowing is the most stressful part of the whole ordeal.

Frankie will be just fine. Babies can take much more change than we give them credit for. If you are calm, he will be, too. I've been smiling, remembering my own kiddos when they were tiny -- #1Son slept like a rock from the beginning, but DD has always been a night-swimmer.

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Thanks again to everybody. FIL is doing substantially better - he's grouchy as hell, but at least he knows who and where he is. Family decided that nobody had to stay overnight with him at the ICU, which is good because Margy is getting some sleep and Frankie seems pretty happy to have her there.

We had a funny scene this morning. This morning I decided that a night away was enough and that I'd take Frankie to the hospital for a little while to see mommy. As I was loading him into the car, I got a "drop everything and get the hell over here NOW with the boy" call. Apparently Margy hadn't thought through the consequences of going 14 hours without nursing.

I was really tired all day. Every time I put Frankie down for a nap, I had an overwhelming urge to take one too. Some of the time he was awake, I wished he wasn't so I could nap even more. I figured it had to do with the crappy sleep I got the night before, and I thought I was kind of being a wuss since I got some sleep while Margy didn't get ANY.

This evening it became apparent that I'm sick. Which is going to make everything going on here more fun, but what can you do? When it rains, it pours. I'm having one of those nights where I go to bed at 7pm, sleep a few hours, wake up and can't get back to sleep, stay up for half an hour, go back to bed, repeat. Fun stuff.

[peacock2121]

Leaky mammary glands for the mommy and a sick daddy.

You have my sympathies.

Hoping things are turning around fast


you punk-ass

[ToLiveIsToFly]

Awful weather, and my inability to help much with childcare, prevented us from visiting today. Margy's sister was in town and spent some time there. He's doing much better. They're going to take out the nitro drip. They're confident enough that he won't try to get out of bed in the middle of the night again that he doesn't need a sitter. The nurse tells us he'll probably be moved out of ICU tomorrow. Which means Frankie will be allowed to visit with mommy and thus I can probably go home Tuesday. He'll be absolutely delighted to see his grandson.

I've slept at least 18 of the past 24 hours. Most of the rest of it has been spent making mad dashes if you know what I mean.

Everything's out of whack now as far as my body clock goes. I think that having slept all day I'm going to be up all night. If I can't sleep I'll head to chat and see if anyone's there.

Hope you and yours are all well. There are no sure things in life, but it looks like everyone is going to come out of this fine.

Thanks to everyone for your good wishes.

[peacock2121]

Wonderful news!

[ToLiveIsToFly]

So the quick update is that all seems to be as well as could be expected. Margy's dad got out of ICU last Sunday. I went home on Tuesday (my car stereo hiccuped and I missed the inauguration, but I'm fine with that). The old man came home from the hospital on Thursday last, and Margy and Frankie got home Sunday. Margy's little brother (also unemployed, but what do you expect - it's Michigan) is there taking care of him for now.

No real updates on his health except that he was well enough to be discharged, which has to be a good sign. The polyp they pulled out turned out not to be benign after all, so it's a good thing they did.

And thanks, everyone, for your good wishes.

[ghostjmf]

Here's hoping for your father-in-law & Margie & you; my bet is that Frankie will do just fine
(like in the picture).