RIP Jean Jaffeson

[PlacentiaSoccerMom]

Jeff's grandmother died this morning. It was not an unexpected death, she had been diagnosed with terminal cancer six months ago and given six months to live. When we saw her last week, she was very jaundiced and we knew that it wouldn't be long. She was mentally alert though physically in pain. We took her "Granddog," as she called him, to go see her. Zap stayed by her bed and let her pet him and I think that it helped her a little.

When her husband Ben died last year, the eulogy was a reflection of Jeff's Dad's uncomfortable relationship with him as given by a Rabbi who didn't know him. Ben was a step-father and they never had a really good relationship and basically Jeff's Dad got in the last word via the Rabbi. The girls and I had a good relationship with him and felt uncomfortable listening to it, but understood Jeff's Dad's feelings.

We knew that Jean was nearing the end and Maddie decided that she wanted to talk at the funeral and give a different perspective than might come from Jeff's Dad. He agreed to let her speak, so she is now figuring out what she is going to say. She's a really good public speaker and the girls came up with some great stories last night, but it's going to be a matter of putting something together. The girls adored Jean and it's important to them for people to know that whatever the relationship she had with others, that she tried to be there for them and was engaged in their lives.

Emma and I are going to do the flowers, as we did for Ben's funeral.

[BackInTex]

I'm so sorry. My condolences to all of Jeff's family.

[Appa23]

I think that having Maddie speak is a wonderful idea.

So far, my kids have been fortunate that they have not had to go through the loss of a grandparent (as my son was not yet one when my dad passed away.)

My condolences to your family.

[MarleysGh0st]

Condolences to the whole family.

A hug to Maddie, for volunteering to speak at the funeral.

And a pat on the head for Zap, for being such a good boy.

[Catfish]

My condolences.
Love,

[Bob78164]

Jeff's grandmother died this morning. It was not an unexpected death, she had been diagnosed with terminal cancer six months ago and given six months to live. When we saw her last week, she was very jaundiced and we knew that it wouldn't be long. She was mentally alert though physically in pain. We took her "Granddog," as she called him, to go see her. Zap stayed by her bed and let her pet him and I think that it helped her a little.

I'm sorry for your family's loss. I'm glad you got to spend quality time with her shortly before the end, and that she had the opportunity to enjoy some remarkable great grandaughters for many years. --Bob

[kayrharris]

I'm so sorry. Maddie will do well. Hugs to all of you.

[Bob Juch]

My condolences.

Maddie will amaze you.

[nitrah55]

My condolences. It sounds, at least, like she had a chance to say her goodbyes, and there's a lot to be said for that.

If I may offer some unsolicited advice to Maddie, having delivered a eulogy at my Mom's funeral in June.

First, thank everybody.

Second (and this is the tricky part), when you're giving a eulogy, you're not doing it to tell people how bad you feel. You're doing it to make them feel better.

Third, thank everybody again.

Like I said, unsolicited, and I suspect Maddie (and her editorial board) is sharp enough to figure this out on her own, but I thought I could save her some time.

My prayers go with you.

[SportsFan68]

PSM, I'm so sorry for this loss in your family.

I agree with Nitrah. It seems to have become common to invite people in the congregation to speak at funerals, and there were some great ones at my uncle's funeral several weeks ago. I told the funniest story I could think of (about the stunned deer coming to life in the car) and would have added my brother's story, but he decided not to send it after all. He said it seemed funny to him at the time but didn't think it would go over at a funeral.

I'm sure Maddie will be 100% appropriate.

[christie1111]

Condolences to all.

Good for Maddie.

And head scritches for Zap.

[silvercamaro]

I send my condolences to your whole family. I know that Maddie will do a wonderful job with her eulogy.

[cindy.wellman]

My thoughts are with you and your family, PSM. I'm sorry you've lost a loved one. I'm happy that Maddie is doing the eulogy.

Big hugs for you.

[rebel2008]

My condolences to you and yours at this sad time.

Maddie will do fine.

Jason Block