[Headquarters]
Colonel Harris: Captain Uly, our mission is to go online and proceed to the Raspberry Bored. Pick up Colonel Littlebeast's path on the board index, follow it and learn what you can along the way. When you find the Colonel, infiltrate his threads by whatever means available and terminate the Colonel's meistership.
Captain Uly: Terminate the Colonel?
General Fantine: He's out there preparing to host Winter Lyrically Speaking without any decent restraint, totally beyond the pale of any acceptable Bored conduct. And he is still in the field accepting promos.
Mini: Terminate with extreme prejudice.
Colonel Harris: You understand, Captain Uly, that this mission does not exist, nor will it ever exist.
[In Colonel Littlebeast's fortress]
Littlebeast: Did they say why, Uly, why they want to terminate my meistership?
Uly: I was sent on a classified mission, sir.
Littlebeast: It's no longer classified, is it? Did they tell you?
Uly: They told me that you had gone totally insane, and that your games and promos were unsound.
Littlebeast: Are my games and promos unsound?
Uly: I don't see any method to them at all, sir.
Littlebeast: I expected someone like you. What did you expect? Are you an assassin?
Uly: I'm a soldier.
Littlebeast: You're neither. You're a notebook boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.
Littlebeast: The horror... the horror...
