Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this year

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AlphaDummy
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Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this year

#1 Post by AlphaDummy » Sat Aug 23, 2008 5:50 pm

From the Home Office, where we haven't tried any of these - yet - heeeere we go.......


10) On the application under "previous game shows" you list "America's Most Wanted"

9) You ask your AP to scratch you where it itches, even though you are fully capable of reaching it yourself

8) "Okay - the tattoo of Meredith is awesome - but what the hell is that squirrel doing there?"

7) AP flips page in Sudoku book from "easy" puzzle to "difficult" halfway through interview

6) "If I won the million? Well, I always wanted to open a brothel..."

5) Your offer to wipe the puddle of drool off the interview table goes unheeded

4) "No, I really don't want to see you crush a beer can..."

3) They aren't coming to Kalamazoo this year

2) "I once sat in on a jam session with Charlie Manson" fails to score any WE cred

1) Flying pigs still not visible on WGAS Weather Radar
"Again" - Herb Brooks (as played by Kurt Russell)
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silvercamaro
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#2 Post by silvercamaro » Sat Aug 23, 2008 5:55 pm

Great list, AD. I might suggest one more.

10(a) The AP recognizes you. In fact, when she first catches sight of you, her eyes light up and she yells, "Security!"
Now generating the White Hot Glare of Righteousness on behalf of BBs everywhere.
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#3 Post by AlphaDummy » Sat Aug 23, 2008 6:02 pm

silvercamaro wrote:Great list, AD. I might suggest one more.

10(a) The AP recognizes you. In fact, when she first catches sight of you, her eyes light up and she yells, "Security!"
Refer back to the intro at the top of the original post...there are reasons I didn't include this one.............. :twisted:
"Again" - Herb Brooks (as played by Kurt Russell)
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themanintheseersuckersuit
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#4 Post by themanintheseersuckersuit » Sat Aug 23, 2008 6:04 pm

"Okay - the tattoo of Meredith is awesome - but what the hell is that squirrel doing there?"
Tattooed squirrel porn in a deal breaker.
Suitguy is not bitter.

feels he represents the many educated and rational onlookers who believe that the hysterical denouncement of lay scepticism is both unwarranted and counter-productive

The problem, then, is that such calls do not address an opposition audience so much as they signal virtue. They talk past those who need convincing. They ignore actual facts and counterargument. And they are irreparably smug.
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swimming chipmunk
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#5 Post by swimming chipmunk » Sat Aug 23, 2008 6:27 pm

Sure! Leave out swimming chipmunks. No respect around here. :oops:
"get me out of here!"
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ulysses5019
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#6 Post by ulysses5019 » Sat Aug 23, 2008 6:52 pm

swimming chipmunk wrote:Sure! Leave out swimming chipmunks. No respect around here. :oops:
What about swimming squirrels?
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.
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geoffil
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#7 Post by geoffil » Sat Aug 23, 2008 8:13 pm

Again you are so funny.

However, I hope this doesn't mean what I think it means.
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silvercamaro
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#8 Post by silvercamaro » Sat Aug 23, 2008 8:22 pm

geoffil wrote:Again you are so funny.

However, I hope this doesn't mean what I think it means.
If it does, I'm going to cover my ears and say "LA-LA-LA, I CAN'T HEAR YOU."
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elwoodblues
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#9 Post by elwoodblues » Sat Aug 23, 2008 9:01 pm

"10) On the application under "previous game shows" you list "America's Most Wanted"

When I auditioned for the primetime show they asked some of us if we had ever been on TV before. I asked if "Cops" counted. I got the postcard saying I was in the pool, but the call never came.
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Re: Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this y

#10 Post by NellyLunatic1980 » Mon Aug 25, 2008 4:32 am

AlphaDummy wrote:8 ) "Okay - the tattoo of Meredith is awesome - but what the hell is that squirrel doing there?"
Something you'll never hear at my interview. I would never get a tattoo of either Meredith or a squirrel.
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earendel
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Re: Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this y

#11 Post by earendel » Mon Aug 25, 2008 5:40 am

AlphaDummy wrote:From the Home Office, where we haven't tried any of these - yet - heeeere we go.......


10) On the application under "previous game shows" you list "America's Most Wanted"

9) You ask your AP to scratch you where it itches, even though you are fully capable of reaching it yourself

8) "Okay - the tattoo of Meredith is awesome - but what the hell is that squirrel doing there?"

7) AP flips page in Sudoku book from "easy" puzzle to "difficult" halfway through interview

6) "If I won the million? Well, I always wanted to open a brothel..."

5) Your offer to wipe the puddle of drool off the interview table goes unheeded

4) "No, I really don't want to see you crush a beer can..."

3) They aren't coming to Kalamazoo this year

2) "I once sat in on a jam session with Charlie Manson" fails to score any WE cred

1) Flying pigs still not visible on WGAS Weather Radar
Another alternate suggestion - "Your Bored handle is MarleysGh0st."
"Elen sila lumenn omentielvo...A star shines on the hour of our meeting."
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ulysses5019
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Re: Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this y

#12 Post by ulysses5019 » Mon Aug 25, 2008 8:57 am

earendel wrote:
AlphaDummy wrote:From the Home Office, where we haven't tried any of these - yet - heeeere we go.......


10) On the application under "previous game shows" you list "America's Most Wanted"

9) You ask your AP to scratch you where it itches, even though you are fully capable of reaching it yourself

8) "Okay - the tattoo of Meredith is awesome - but what the hell is that squirrel doing there?"

7) AP flips page in Sudoku book from "easy" puzzle to "difficult" halfway through interview

6) "If I won the million? Well, I always wanted to open a brothel..."

5) Your offer to wipe the puddle of drool off the interview table goes unheeded

4) "No, I really don't want to see you crush a beer can..."

3) They aren't coming to Kalamazoo this year

2) "I once sat in on a jam session with Charlie Manson" fails to score any WE cred

1) Flying pigs still not visible on WGAS Weather Radar
Another alternate suggestion - "Your Bored handle is MarleysGh0st."
That's a low blow.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.
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MarleysGh0st
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Re: Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this y

#13 Post by MarleysGh0st » Mon Aug 25, 2008 9:17 am

ulysses5019 wrote:
earendel wrote: Another alternate suggestion - "Your Bored handle is MarleysGh0st."
That's a low blow.
It's true, though. :|

Are you sorry you didn't think of it first? :P
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ulysses5019
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Re: Top ten signs you probably aren't in the BAM pool this y

#14 Post by ulysses5019 » Mon Aug 25, 2008 9:20 am

MarleysGh0st wrote:
ulysses5019 wrote:
earendel wrote: Another alternate suggestion - "Your Bored handle is MarleysGh0st."
That's a low blow.
It's true, though. :|

Are you sorry you didn't think of it first? :P
I would never have MarleysGh0st as a handle.
I believe in the usefulness of useless information.
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