WWTBAM Bored

is barely making it to express what I feel today. Spent the morning where most parents dread to sit and watch, but it was so important to show support and compliance.

The events of early May had their finale today, and what could have been rather drastic results, ended up to be severe, but do-able.

It will be a long 18 months of rules and reporting and restitution, but at the end of it all it will be gone. Help has been mandated and is gratefully accepted.

Here's hoping that this rude awakening is enough to keep the #)%&*%*&*#) kid of mine awake!

There but for the grace of God and a couple of bad breaks or mistakes go any parent on this Bored or anywhere else--especially me. You know the big picture is that the future and all its positive possibilities are preserved. To me at least, this is what a great Mom fights for and you got there.

God bless and keep you and James.

{{{{hugs}}}}

a1mamacat wrote:Here's hoping that this rude awakening is enough to keep the #)%&*%*&*#) kid of mine awake!

Saucy, forgive me for not knowing specifically what you're talking about, but from what you are saying here, you are very correct! And, although you will say Hell no!, this experience will probably end up as a positive one. My example might not have anything to do with your situation, but I think that the theme is universal.

(No, this isn't going to be another 'when I worked for the Court' story.)

Recently my nephew did something stupid and, even though I think he could have beaten the charge, I talked to my sister and we agreed it would be a better result if he owned up and took his punishment. He got a deferred sentence, recently completed his requirements and I truly believe he did indeed learn his lesson. Time will tell, but it has certainly improved his attitude.

So much for all about me, now about you! Saucy, your son has going for him what my nephew had going for him. A mother who loves him, truly cares about not only his welfare, but his place in the world and is willing to give him whatever help and support is necessary. That's more important than anything else.

Edit: I decided to cut out all the boring 'when I was a kid' stuff. Because it was boring. Ha!

I was a Juvenile Probation Officer for 7 years. I also spent several years working in residential programs for mandated young people.

If I learned anything from all that, it is that the "why" for a young person in trouble is never as simple as pointing at the parent(s). All parents can do is provide a foundation. Genetics, circumstances, peers, poor choices at the wrong time, etc. can result in a young person veering "off course."

The humbling thing for me as a parent is knowing that the most I can do is raise the odds that my kids will make good choices most of the time, and then commit to love them when they don't. And pray that in spite of the poor choices they make - and they will inevitably make poor choices at times - they will eventually outgrow adolescence and move into adulthood.

Reading your posts, it is clear that your son has a mom who clearly loves him even when he is most unlovable, and that is perhaps the greatest gift a parent can give her/his child.

I know its small comfort to you, but you are not the first parent to go through such a thing, nor will you be the last. With you on his side the odds are in your son's favor. I will send a few prayers your way.

I know you must mentally exhausted and stressed. This may be the turning point he needed.

I admire you for your tenacity and ability to love him and see him through this. Best of luck to both of you.

Hugs and hoping things only get better for you and James.

Love, Mom

Hugs to you!

You will get through this and he soon will have out grown the hormones clouding his vision and decision making abilities.

You will live through it and it seems that James will also make it.

christie1111

{{{hugs}}} Saucy!

My late mom said only a few things in her life that were quotable, this is one of them:

"You spend your whole life worrying about all the terrible things that could happen to you.

"Then, the things that happen to you are so much worse than the things you were worried about.

"And, you still get through it."

You're coming through a tough one. Good for you, good for James.

Prayers from here.

Hang in there, Saucy. Kids do stupid things, it's a fact of life. James got caught and is taking his punishment, and knows you are with him every step of the way. The most heart-breaking thing I see at work is the kids who screwed up, are brought before the judge, and look out into the gallery to see mom or dad ... and no one is there. Rips my heart out. It'll get better, Saucy. The worst is over, and knowing what needs to be done is vastly better than the unknown.

hugs.

t.

Can't add anything better than what others have already said, Saucy. Know that there's plenty of well-wishers out here.

I am glad this is a case where restitution is doable & that James will be allowed do it, rather than hard time.

You have my empathy.

Things have been and will continue to be learned.

Bless you and James.