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speaking of fowl

Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 8:49 pm
by BigDrawMan
the goose eggs are still goose eggs

i tried to chase off the baby mama to see if the hatching commenced, but she just hissed at me and called me names.

I was also hoping she would get herself a ho bath.

her stench is sticking to my shower shoes,

Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 8:51 pm
by silvercamaro
Poor little baby mama.

She's probably embarrassed that the smell of your shower shoes is sticking to her stench.

Posted: Wed Jun 18, 2008 9:12 pm
by Rexer25
Have you been catching up on post-natal care for goslings?

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 7:51 am
by gsabc
Rexer25 wrote:Have you been catching up on post-natal care for goslings?
The care is the same as how WC Fields liked children. Boiled.

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 9:27 am
by tlynn78
What is a ho bath?


t.

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 9:29 am
by ulysses5019
tlynn78 wrote:What is a ho bath?


t.
Stick around and I'll show you.

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 9:35 am
by ulysses5019
tlynn78 wrote:What is a ho bath?


t.
Speaking of which....


The Brothel





The madam opened the brothel door and saw a rather dignified,
well-dressed, good-looking man in his late forties or early fifties.
"May I help you?" she asked.
"I want to see Valerie," the man replied.

"Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would
prefer someone else," said the madam.

"No. I must see Valerie," he replied.

Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged
$5,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out five thousand
dollars and gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an
hour, the man calmly left.

The next night, the same man appeared again, once more demanding to see
Valerie. Valerie explained that no one had ever come back two nights
in a row -- too expensive -- and there were no discounts. The price was
still $5,000.

Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie, and they went
upstairs. After an hour, he left.

The following night the man was there yet again. Everyone was
astounded that he had come for a third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and
they went upstairs.

After their session, Valerie questioned the man. "No one has ever been
with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?" she asked.

The man replied, "South Carolina."

"Really" she said. "I have family in South Carolina."

"I know, " the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's
attorney. She asked me to give you your $15,000 inheritance."

The moral of the story is that three things in life are certain:

1. Death
2. Taxes
3. Being screwed by a lawye

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 10:25 am
by tlynn78
one day Harry the Eagle waited at the nest for Mary his darlin of 10 glorious years.
He went looking and found her. She had been shot. Dead!
Harry was devastated. After about six minutes of mourning he decided that he must get himself another mate. But he just might like to cross the feather barrier. So he flew off to find a new mate.
He found a lovely DOVE and brought her back to the nest.
The sex was OK, but all the DOVE would say is I am a DOVE.
I want to Love! I am a DOVE. I want to love!

Well this got on Harry's nerves so he kicked the Dove out of the nest and flew off once more to find a mate.

He found a very sexy LOON and brought her back to the nest.
Again the sex was great, but all the LOON would say is, I am a LOON,
I want to spoon! I am a LOON I want to spoon!

Egads, out with the LOON.

Once more he flew off to find a mate. This time he found a gorgeous DUCK, so he brought the DUCK back to the nest. Again the sex was great, but all the DUCK would say was...well....you know.






NO.....the DUCK didn't say THAT!!!!! That's an awful thing to think!!



little further




The Duck said, I am a DRAKE you made a MISTAKE!

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 10:35 am
by NellyLunatic1980
tlynn78 wrote:one day Harry the Eagle waited at the nest for Mary his darlin of 10 glorious years.
He went looking and found her. She had been shot. Dead!
Harry was devastated. After about six minutes of mourning he decided that he must get himself another mate. But he just might like to cross the feather barrier. So he flew off to find a new mate.
He found a lovely DOVE and brought her back to the nest.
The sex was OK, but all the DOVE would say is I am a DOVE.
I want to Love! I am a DOVE. I want to love!

Well this got on Harry's nerves so he kicked the Dove out of the nest and flew off once more to find a mate.

He found a very sexy LOON and brought her back to the nest.
Again the sex was great, but all the LOON would say is, I am a LOON,
I want to spoon! I am a LOON I want to spoon!

Egads, out with the LOON.

Once more he flew off to find a mate. This time he found a gorgeous DUCK, so he brought the DUCK back to the nest. Again the sex was great, but all the DUCK would say was...well....you know.






NO.....the DUCK didn't say THAT!!!!! That's an awful thing to think!!



little further




The Duck said, I am a DRAKE you made a MISTAKE!
That was funny right there, I don't care who you are!

Posted: Thu Jun 19, 2008 10:43 am
by tlynn78
That was funny right there, I don't care who you are!

:lol: my mom sent it to me.


t.