F**king up the political process (2022 edition)
Posted: Thu Oct 13, 2022 3:24 pm
*phone ring*
Me: "Hello?"
Random female: "Hi, is this Russ?"
Me: "Maybe? What's your business?"
Random female: "My name is (redacted) and I'm calling on behalf of Governor Mike DeWine."
Me: "I'm sorry, I suffered a stroke last year and I still have a difficult time understanding people. Could you direct me to a website so that I could read it on my own terms? And could you spell it slowly so that I can understand you?"
Random female: "M-I-K-E-D-E-W-I-N-E-dot-com"
Me: "Oh my God, that is disgusting! Ma'am, I'm a pastor! How dare you direct me to this porno website!"
Random female: "Beg your pardon?"
Me: "Ma'am, don't play stupid with me. You're the one who directed me to a website called DykesDivine.com"
Random female: "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! I said MikeDeWine.com!"
Me: "That's why I told you to speak slowly! Jesus, you're such an uppity out-of-touch elitist! You people don't pay attention to what real Americans tell you."
Robot: "You have been disconnected from this call."
Well, there's another Repubican snowflake who won't be calling me again.
Me: "Hello?"
Random female: "Hi, is this Russ?"
Me: "Maybe? What's your business?"
Random female: "My name is (redacted) and I'm calling on behalf of Governor Mike DeWine."
Me: "I'm sorry, I suffered a stroke last year and I still have a difficult time understanding people. Could you direct me to a website so that I could read it on my own terms? And could you spell it slowly so that I can understand you?"
Random female: "M-I-K-E-D-E-W-I-N-E-dot-com"
Me: "Oh my God, that is disgusting! Ma'am, I'm a pastor! How dare you direct me to this porno website!"
Random female: "Beg your pardon?"
Me: "Ma'am, don't play stupid with me. You're the one who directed me to a website called DykesDivine.com"
Random female: "NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! I said MikeDeWine.com!"
Me: "That's why I told you to speak slowly! Jesus, you're such an uppity out-of-touch elitist! You people don't pay attention to what real Americans tell you."
Robot: "You have been disconnected from this call."
Well, there's another Repubican snowflake who won't be calling me again.