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She's not going to live much longer.

She has three large "masses" on her pancreas from left to right. The doctor can't say they're cancer until a biopsy is done, but they can't be anything else.

Her pancreas is so enlarged that it's pushing her other organs out of its way. She has numbness in her abdomen, probably because her nerves are pinched or destroyed. That's actually good, as she'd be in a massive amount of pain otherwise.

Radiation or chemo won't cure those and would give her just a few months more. She doesn't want that. Without any treatment, she's already vomiting many times per day and can't bathe herself or drive.

I'm writing her medical directives, her medical power of attorney, and her will for her using templates.

Prayers, vibes, whatever are accepted.

Oh Bob, I am so sorry. Hugs to you and your daughter

Damn, that sucks. Cancer is such a bitch, and so is outliving our kids.

This is awful. Prayers from here.

I'm so sorry to hear this, Bob. --Bob

Prayers and hugs from the Spiffdom.

Bob, this is terrible news. Our prayers and best wishes to you and your family.

Bob Juch wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 10:35 am

She's not going to live much longer.

She has three large "masses" on her pancreas from left to right. The doctor can't say they're cancer until a biopsy is done, but they can't be anything else.

Her pancreas is so enlarged that it's pushing her other organs out of its way. She has numbness in her abdomen, probably because her nerves are pinched or destroyed. That's actually good, as she'd be in a massive amount of pain otherwise.

Radiation or chemo won't cure those and would give her just a few months more. She doesn't want that. Without any treatment, she's already vomiting many times per day and can't bathe herself or drive.

I'm writing her medical directives, her medical power of attorney, and her will for her using templates.

Prayers, vibes, whatever are accepted.

I want to make a suggestion that may help bring her a little comfort.

A few months ago a friend of mine from the bridge world received a terminal diagnosis. Using a bridge-related Web site, one of his other friends started a "nobituary." The idea was for people to write about the positive ways in which this friend had touched our lives while he was still around to read and enjoy them. And they did, by the scores. My friend passed away a couple of months ago, having had the opportunity to read those words.

Perhaps (if the prognosis is as grim at it appears to be) your daughter would appreciate what her friends might write in a "nobituary." --Bob

Bob78164 wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 3:30 pm

Bob Juch wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 10:35 am

She's not going to live much longer.

She has three large "masses" on her pancreas from left to right. The doctor can't say they're cancer until a biopsy is done, but they can't be anything else.

Her pancreas is so enlarged that it's pushing her other organs out of its way. She has numbness in her abdomen, probably because her nerves are pinched or destroyed. That's actually good, as she'd be in a massive amount of pain otherwise.

Radiation or chemo won't cure those and would give her just a few months more. She doesn't want that. Without any treatment, she's already vomiting many times per day and can't bathe herself or drive.

I'm writing her medical directives, her medical power of attorney, and her will for her using templates.

Prayers, vibes, whatever are accepted.

I want to make a suggestion that may help bring her a little comfort.

A few months ago a friend of mine from the bridge world received a terminal diagnosis. Using a bridge-related Web site, one of his other friends started a "nobituary." The idea was for people to write about the positive ways in which this friend had touched our lives while he was still around to read and enjoy them. And they did, by the scores. My friend passed away a couple of months ago, having had the opportunity to read those words.

Perhaps (if the prognosis is as grim at it appears to be) your daughter would appreciate what her friends might write in a "nobituary." --Bob

I'm truly saddened, and stunned, by this news. Your daughter has my sympathies and prayers. You do, too.

I don't recall if you had more than one child. Is this your only daughter, the one who does trafficking rescues, and had the small part in the movie?


And I think Bob#s suggestion above is a fabulous one. I'd never heard of that but it is a great idea.

Bob,

So sorry to read this. Sending my deepest sympathies.

Andy

Bob - My heart hurts reading this.

As many prayers and vibes as possible heading your way and hers from Boonie and me.

BackInTex wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 6:05 pm

Bob78164 wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 3:30 pm

Bob Juch wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 10:35 am

She's not going to live much longer.

She has three large "masses" on her pancreas from left to right. The doctor can't say they're cancer until a biopsy is done, but they can't be anything else.

Her pancreas is so enlarged that it's pushing her other organs out of its way. She has numbness in her abdomen, probably because her nerves are pinched or destroyed. That's actually good, as she'd be in a massive amount of pain otherwise.

Radiation or chemo won't cure those and would give her just a few months more. She doesn't want that. Without any treatment, she's already vomiting many times per day and can't bathe herself or drive.

I'm writing her medical directives, her medical power of attorney, and her will for her using templates.

Prayers, vibes, whatever are accepted.

I want to make a suggestion that may help bring her a little comfort.

A few months ago a friend of mine from the bridge world received a terminal diagnosis. Using a bridge-related Web site, one of his other friends started a "nobituary." The idea was for people to write about the positive ways in which this friend had touched our lives while he was still around to read and enjoy them. And they did, by the scores. My friend passed away a couple of months ago, having had the opportunity to read those words.

Perhaps (if the prognosis is as grim at it appears to be) your daughter would appreciate what her friends might write in a "nobituary." --Bob

I'm truly saddened, and stunned, by this news. Your daughter has my sympathies and prayers. You do, too.

I don't recall if you had more than one child. Is this your only daughter, the one who does trafficking rescues, and had the small part in the movie?


And I think Bob#s suggestion above is a fabulous one. I'd never heard of that but it is a great idea.

Yes, that's her. She has very few social media friends. Most are either local or used to be and moved away.

She's now in the first stage of grief. I expect her to progress through the other six.

I am so sorry to hear.

My heart is with both of you.

BackInTex wrote: ↑

Wed Dec 08, 2021 6:05 pm

And I think Bob#s suggestion above is a fabulous one. I'd never heard of that but it is a great idea.

I wholeheartedly agree.

My thoughts are with you and your daughter. Those words seem so inadequate, but I'm not sure there ARE any that could convey my feelings upon reading this.

She's in the first of five stages of grief: Denial.

I'm paying for her membership in the Neptune Society. She wants the additional travel and relocation coverage as she says she will feel better and wants to travel. Last night she got four hours of sleep because she was up vomiting.

The remaining four are:
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

Bob, are they giving her any palliative stuff? Anti nausea, pain, etc?

Beebs52 wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 2:27 pm

Bob, are they giving her any palliative stuff? Anti nausea, pain, etc?

She isn't in any pain. Apparently her nerves are pinched or destroyed. She is taking an anti-nausea drug but it's not working. She's too weak to move through her home without aid.

She's talking to a rep from the Neptune Society as I write this.

Bob Juch wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 3:05 pm

Beebs52 wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 2:27 pm

Bob, are they giving her any palliative stuff? Anti nausea, pain, etc?

She isn't in any pain. Apparently her nerves are pinched or destroyed. She is taking an anti-nausea drug but it's not working. She's too weak to move through her home without aid.

She's talking to a rep from the Neptune Society as I write this.

Does she have hospice or in home care? This is just hard.

Beebs52 wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 3:08 pm

Bob Juch wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 3:05 pm

Beebs52 wrote: ↑

Fri Dec 10, 2021 2:27 pm

Bob, are they giving her any palliative stuff? Anti nausea, pain, etc?

She isn't in any pain. Apparently her nerves are pinched or destroyed. She is taking an anti-nausea drug but it's not working. She's too weak to move through her home without aid.

She's talking to a rep from the Neptune Society as I write this.

Does she have hospice or in home care? This is just hard.

She lives with her boyfriend and her half-sister is staying there to help. She may have to go into hospice eventually.

Thanks for caring.

After talking with the Neptune Society guy today, Heather is more accepting of her fate, but she still thinks she'll be able to go to Ireland.

Then, this evening my granddaughter called me to say her ex had changed their kids' flight to Orlando to go to Walt Disney World for Christmas. It took me an hour, but I was able to get that changed back. She'll be pursuing a contempt of court charge against him.

I'm getting tired of being the rock of this family.

Bob, I'm so sorry. Thanks for being the rock -- somehow it got to be your turn. I know how difficult it is (personal experience with Mom), but you'll be glad you were there for her.

I am so sorry, Bob. Condolences and prayers for everyone.

gsabc wrote: ↑

Sun Dec 12, 2021 6:08 pm

I am so sorry, Bob. Condolences and prayers for everyone.

Thank you; this was not a good day.

Heather finally got an OR spot. Her doctor had to spend hours on the phone to find a hospital with one.

She's having the three tumors biopsied on Wednesday and her pancreas drained. After the biopsies are analyzed, they'll know how aggressive it is.

I haven't posted about Heather lately. She does have pancreatic cancer; it's inoperable. She just discovered she has a cataract in her left eye (only). The ophthalmologist gave her a COVID test, and the Colorado Department of Health called her Sunday to tell her it was positive. She has no symptoms but has to wait for the operation.

To top all that off, her older daughter, Leanna, was living with a roommate. Leanna's daughter found her in a coma on the kitchen floor from a fentanyl overdose. Leanna was passed out in her car n the garage. Her friends took the roommate to the ER, where she was declared DOA.

Leanna and her boyfriend came to stay with Heather, saying they were freaked out and couldn't stay in the apartment. Leanna said she would stop using and was clean for three weeks. Heather's boyfriend has security cameras all around his house and saw that Leanna and the boyfriend were going out to her car for hours. Heather didn't believe that and got into a physical fight with her boyfriend and had three teeth knocked out. So she, Leanna, and the boyfriend moved back into the apartment. Heather moved many of her belongings there but couldn't move furniture because of snowstorms.

Then Leanna got high and had her friends partying there. Afterward, Heather found all sorts of her stuff missing, including her boss's professional camera gear. She moved back with her boyfriend then discovered that Leanna had taken her large HDTV and Amazon Echo Show. She brought them back a few days later. Heather filed a police report, so some things will probably appear in a pawn shop. She was also questioned about the death and said she thinks Leanna had something to do with it due to her social media postings. Leanna is hiding out somewhere.

So go the days of our lives.