Fire up the toaster!

[Bob78164]

The toaster's still warming up, but it's time to get the thread started. Congratulations to the Los Angeles Dodgers, who have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[silverscreenselect]

With 16 out of 30 MLB teams making the playoffs, it's a lot harder to get toastified this season unless you're the Boston Red Sox.

[SpacemanSpiff]

Does this mean that if you are one of the last few teams to make the playoffs that you aren't toasted, but merely slightly singed?

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Chicago White Sox, who have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Tampa Bay Rays, who have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

The Pirates suffered their 36th loss of the season today so Pittsburgh cannot win more than 24 games. Chicago has already won 31 games and Cincinnati has already won 26 games, so the Pirates cannot finish better than third in the National League Central Division. Atlanta, Miami, and Philadelphia all have won at least 26 games so Pittsburgh will finish behind the third-place team in the National League Eastern Division. The Dodgers, the Padres, and the Giants all have won at least 25 games so the Pirates will finish behind the third-place team in the National League Western Division.

It's the latest first elimination ever but it's finally happened. Pittsburgh has been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Oakland As, who have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Minnesota Twins, who have clinched a post-season berth. —Bob

[Bob78164]

Arizona has lost 34 games so far this season so the Diamondbacks cannot win more than 26 games. Los Angeles and San Diego each have won at least 33 games so Arizona cannot finish better than third in the National League Western Division. The Braves, Marlins, and Phillies each have won at least 27 games so the Diamondbacks will finish behind the third-place team in the National League Eastern Division. Chicago and Cincinnati both have won at least 27 games. St. Louis and Milwaukee both have won 26 games and the Cardinals and Brewers still have 4 games remaining against each other, so at least one of those teams will finish with at least 28 wins, which means the Diamondbacks will finish behind at least three teams in the National League Central Division.

Not much more baseball in the desert this year. Arizona has been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the San Diego Padres, who have clinched a post-season berth. Congratulations also to the New York Yankees, who also have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Boston has lost 34 games so the Red Sox cannot win more than 26 games. Tampa Bay, the Yankees, and Toronto all have won at least 27 games so Boston cannot finish better than fourth in the American League Eastern Divisioin. The White Sox, the Twins, and the Indians all have won at least 29 games so the Red Sox will finish behind the third-place team in the American League Central Division.

Irish eyes may be smiling but Boston's eyes are crying. The Red Sox have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Texas has lost 34 games so the Rangers cannot win more than 26 games. Oakland and Houston each have won at least 27 games to Texas cannot finish better than third in the American League Western Division. Tampa Bay, the Yankees, and Toronto all have won at least 27 games so the Ranges will finish behind the third-place team in the American League Eastern Divisioin. The White Sox, the Twins, and the Indians all have won at least 29 games so Texas will finish behind the third-place team in the American League Central Division.

Not even Chuck Norris could save Texas this season. The Rangers have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the American League Western Division champion Oakland As. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Chicago Cubs, who have clinched a post-season berth (even if MLB hasn't yet figured that out). The Cubs have already won 32 games. St. Louis and Milwaukee still have 5 games remaining against each other, so one of them will finish with at least 29 losses. The Cubs win a head-to-head tiebreak with Cincinnati. The Cubs win a three-way tiebreak with Milwaukee and Cincinnati. Cincinnati loses a three way tie-break with Chicago and St. Louis. That means there's no way the Cubs can finish worse than second in the National League Central Division. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the National League Eastern Division champion Atlanta Braves. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Cleveland Indians, who have clinched a post-season berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Kansas City has lost 33 games so the Royals cannot win more than 27 games. The White Sox, the Twins, and the Indians all have won at least 31 games so Kansas City cannot finish better than fourth in the American League Central Division. Tampa Bay, the Yankees, and Toronto all have won at least 28 games so the Royals also will finish behind the third-place team in the American League Eastern Division.

It's barbecue time in Kansas City. The Royals have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Baltimore has lost 32 games so the Orioles cannot win more than 28 games. Tampa Bay and the Yankees each have won at least 32 games so the Orioles cannot finish better than third in the American League Eastern Division. Toronto has won 28 games, and 6 of its wins have come against Baltimore, so the Blue Jays win a tie-break against the Orioles and the Orioles cannot finish better than fourth in the American League Eastern Division. The White Sox, the Twins, and the Indians all have won at least 31 games so Baltimore also will finish behind at least three teams in the American League Central Division.

The star-spangled banner may still fly over Baltimore but no pennants will this year. The Orioles have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the National League Western Division champion Los Angeles Dodgers. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Washington has now lost 33 games so the Nationals cannot win more than 27 games. Atlanta, Miami, and Philadelphia all have won at least 28 games so Washington cannot finish better than fourth in the National League Eastern Division. The Cubs and the Reds each have won at least 29 games. St. Louis and Milwaukee have won 27 games each and they have 5 games remaining against each other, so at least one of those teams will win at least 30 games, which means the Nationals will finish behind the third-place team in the National League Central Division.

No back-to-back titles this year in Washington. The Nationals have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the American League Eastern Division champion Tampa Bay Rays. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Detroit has lost 31 games so the Tigers cannot win more than 29 games. The White Sox, the Twins, and the Indians all have won at least 32 games so Detroit cannot finish better than fourth in the American League Central Division. Tampa Bay and the Yankees each have won at least 32 games. Toronto has won 29 games, including 19 games within the division. The Tigers have already lost 24 games within the division so they cannot win more than 16. Detroit will therefore finish behind at least three teams in the American League Eastern Division.

Time for the Tigers to drive off into the sunset. Detroit has been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Toronto Blue Jays, who have clinched a postseason berth. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Seattle has lost 31 games so the Mariners cannot win more than 29 games. Oakland has already won 34 games so Seattle cannot win the American League Western Division. Houston has won 29 games so the Mariners can tie Houston. However, the Astros won 7 of their 10 games against Seattle so Seattle loses a head-to-head tiebreak with Houston. The Angels have lost 31 games and a three-way tie is possible. Los Angeles has won 5 of 10 games against Seattle and has won 6 of 10 games against Houston. Thus, the Angels and the Astros each have won 11 of their 20 games against the other two teams whereas the Mariners have won 8 of their 20 games. The Mariners therefore cannot win a three-way tiebreak either so the Mariners cannot finish better than third in the American League Western Division.

Minnesota, Chicago, and Cleveland all have won at least 33 games so Seattle will finish behind at least three teams in the American League Central Division. The Rays, the Yankees, and the Blue Jays all have won at least 30 games so the Mariners will finish behind at least three teams in the American League Eastern Division.

The smoke may have cleared in Seattle but there's nothing to see here. The Mariners have been toastified. --Bob

[Bob78164]

Congratulations to the Miami Marlins, who have clinched a postseason berth. --Bob