WWTBAM Bored

A snake is somewhere in my house, unless he's found a way out. I saw his head and, later, parts of his midsection underneath a tv stand that's holding an old, non-connected computer. He rattled his tail and scared the daylights out of me. It was not a baby. This was a good-sized snake.

I got the dogs out of the office, shut the door, called 911, and described the snake. "If it's yellow and black, it's not a rattlesnake," the dispatcher said, "but we'll send someone out." I waited a while, a long while, as it evidently took several rounds before somebody could actually pull the shortest straw. The lucky uniformed "winner" arrived. He was more freaked by and knew less about snakes than I, and that's not saying much. The snake was no longer where I'd last seen him. Together, we moved furniture, carried boxes and luggage out of the closet, and looked under and behind everything, but we could not find the snake. My theory is that he has some way -- an old mousehole or some kind of opening -- that let him escape into the wall.

I've now done an internet search. My best guess is that he is a speckled king snake, non-poisonous. This is the picture that looks most like the body I saw:

http://tinyurl.com/6lcpd3

Very pretty, if you like snakes. I don't. I particularly don't want to live with one. An exterminator will come tomorrow morning, although I'm not sure what he can do if he can't find the critter. If he does find him and wants to capture and release him far, far away, that's okay with me, too.

I think the dogs and I will sleep on the couch tonight, at the most distant possible point from the office, with all possible doors closed and blocked.

I see that Jeff signed on. I am sure that he will have an opinion.

(By the way Jebbers, the girls in your house are watching the returns for Indiana and we are getting sadder by the minute.)

Yikes.

King snakes are indeed basically harmless, although that does not help much when one is in your house.

Let us know how it works out.

I wouldn't sleep a wink knowing there was a snake somewhere. I agree with you that it probably left the same way it got in, whatever means that might have been.

Good luck and be careful. I would probably be packing a little bag and finding me a room somewhere.

kayrharris wrote: I would probably be packing a little bag and finding me a room somewhere.

It wouldn't be easy to find a place that would take me and the dogs, especially this late, and I sure wouldn't leave the woofers here alone. I would think that even if the snake were not venomous, it still could bite -- and would, if cornered.

I am armed with a shovel and a big stick. I am hopeful that the reptile is more nervous about me than vice versa.

Can't we just all get along?

ulysses5019 wrote:Can't we just all get along?

Oops. Too late.

The snake reappeared -- in my kitchen! On the windowsill! Creepy crawling through the miniblinds! I called the police again. One policeman arrived (a different one than was here earlier) who looked at the snake and promptly got on his radio to ask for backup and animal control. Animal control was paged, but as far as any of us can tell, the page won't be answered until somebody wakes up in the morning. With two officers, the big stick, the shovel, the broom and dustpan, my sharpest chef's knife, a garbage bag, and about 45 minutes of serpent-wrangling, the snake was pinned down, lobotomized, beheaded, and slipped into a garbage bag for transport to the Big Snake Rendezvous in the Sky.

He turned out to be about 4 to 4-1/2 feet long, with or without his former head. He had attitude. He shall not be missed.

I don't know how or when he got from the office to the kitchen. If there turn out to be two snakes, I'm moving.

To Antarctica. I've heard that the snake population there is relatively low.

Did you have a chance to take pics?

Yay!

The dogs have had more excitement tonight than in weeks.

Well, and us, too.

etaoin22 wrote:Did you have a chance to take pics?

I did not. That is, I guess I had time to do so. I had neither desire for a memorial photo nor willingness to get any closer to it than necessary.

Besides, I didn't want it to leave the windowsill, as I was terrified it would go behind or under the refrigerator before the police arrived.

Ritterskoop wrote:Yay!

The dogs have had more excitement tonight than in weeks.

Well, and us, too.

Annie wanted to watch Animal Planet. They were showing a lovely program on the Gaboon pit viper.

I was not amused.

When the cops arrived, did you tell them,

Spoiler

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking windowsill!"

?

silvercamaro wrote:To Antarctica. I've heard that the snake population there is relatively low.

Go to Hawaii instead, same snake scarcity, not so dry - better for the skin.

Hawaii doesn't have any snakes.

Might be a better choice.

silvercamaro wrote:

ulysses5019 wrote:Can't we just all get along?

Oops. Too late.

The snake reappeared -- in my kitchen! On the windowsill! Creepy crawling through the miniblinds! I called the police again. One policeman arrived (a different one than was here earlier) who looked at the snake and promptly got on his radio to ask for backup and animal control. Animal control was paged, but as far as any of us can tell, the page won't be answered until somebody wakes up in the morning. With two officers, the big stick, the shovel, the broom and dustpan, my sharpest chef's knife, a garbage bag, and about 45 minutes of serpent-wrangling, the snake was pinned down, lobotomized, beheaded, and slipped into a garbage bag for transport to the Big Snake Rendezvous in the Sky.

He turned out to be about 4 to 4-1/2 feet long, with or without his former head. He had attitude. He shall not be missed.

I don't know how or when he got from the office to the kitchen. If there turn out to be two snakes, I'm moving.

To Antarctica. I've heard that the snake population there is relatively low.

Ireland might be a better choice - after all, St. Patrick expelled all the snakes from the Emerald Isle.

silvercamaro wrote:

ulysses5019 wrote:Can't we just all get along?

Oops. Too late.

The snake reappeared -- in my kitchen! On the windowsill! Creepy crawling through the miniblinds! I called the police again. One policeman arrived (a different one than was here earlier) who looked at the snake and promptly got on his radio to ask for backup and animal control. Animal control was paged, but as far as any of us can tell, the page won't be answered until somebody wakes up in the morning. With two officers, the big stick, the shovel, the broom and dustpan, my sharpest chef's knife, a garbage bag, and about 45 minutes of serpent-wrangling, the snake was pinned down, lobotomized, beheaded, and slipped into a garbage bag for transport to the Big Snake Rendezvous in the Sky.

He turned out to be about 4 to 4-1/2 feet long, with or without his former head. He had attitude. He shall not be missed.

I don't know how or when he got from the office to the kitchen. If there turn out to be two snakes, I'm moving.

To Antarctica. I've heard that the snake population there is relatively low.

I think it was mean of me and not very supportive - I laughed and laughed and laughed and then read your account again and laughed some more.

I am bad.

I know I would not be laughing if it were me.

I am still laughing.

I can see the scene in my head.

It is still funny.

Not in a mocking way, of course.

silvercamaro wrote:

etaoin22 wrote:Did you have a chance to take pics?

I did not. That is, I guess I had time to do so. I had neither desire for a memorial photo nor willingness to get any closer to it than necessary.

Besides, I didn't want it to leave the windowsill, as I was terrified it would go behind or under the refrigerator before the police arrived.

I just added the imaginary scene of Uday taking pictures of the officers and the officers being annoyed at her.

Madam - put down the camera!

I am still laughing.

I am sorry I am still laughing.

I know it is inappropriate.

TheConfessor wrote:When the cops arrived, did you tell them,

Spoiler

"Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking windowsill!"

?

This really made me laugh.

I almost peed myself.

silvercamaro wrote: He turned out to be about 4 to 4-1/2 feet long, with or without his former head. He had attitude. He shall not be missed.

Goodness, what an evening you had!

Non-poisonous or not, that's one impressive snake to make the cop call for backup!

Would you really like to see the snake of the day....?

ulysses5019 wrote:Can't we just all get along?

You know, Uly, it's quite an entertaining game when I'm catching up on the threads and notice that you've changed you avatar again. Then it becomes a scavenger hunt, trying to find what event was the inspiration for this one.

And the snake/pit bull combination really had me scratching my head...

If that had happened to us, there would be a GW-shaped hole in the wall.

I, and the three exterminators she called, would be moving everything around in the basement to find it.

GW and BD would be in a hotel until it was found.

And the animals would have to be locked in a room, because they would want to be the ones who found it.

I am glad that the snake is no longer at your house.

Snakes don't bother me, it's rats, squirrels and clowns that bother me.

I guess we can't all get along?

I guess the good thing is it showed up again while you were still up and about and could see it. I would have been out of there so fast it would not have been funny. I'm glad it is gone and sincerely hope there aren't any snake family members hanging around nearby.

I would be investigating the possible ways it was able to enter your home. I am also glad you were able to get the help you needed.