WWTBAM Bored

My ex-father-in-law, whom I have always liked and gotten along well with, has been in the beginning stage of alzheimers. He lives in the Netherlands where doctor assisted suicide is legal, so on Thursday, he is going to have his whole family with him as he is euthanized. This is such a strange feeling for me. I will not be there since my ex has remarried, but I still feel like he is a part of my life and to see in pictures on facebook that he is laughing with my children and grandchildren and that on Thursday he will be gone fills me with grief. But even more, I am really having a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea that everyone is there to say good-bye for what will truly be the last time. The whole thing feels morbid and yet at the same time I know he has always lived on his own terms and is now dying the same way. I truly do not have words for the kinds of emotions I'm feeling.

That's tough, Krox - here's hoping you get to the point of being okay with him being able to go out on his own terms. It's a tough thing to wrap your head around. We're conditioned, I think, to want to wring every single second of life we can get, and to expect others to do the same.

He is still part of your family and it is natural for you to have these feelings. Best wishes.