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Woman Goes for Leg Operation, Gets New Anus Instead

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

A German retiree is taking a hospital to court after she went in for a leg operation and got a new anus instead, the Daily Telegraph is reporting.

The woman woke up to find she had been mixed up with another patient suffering from incontinence who was to have surgery on her sphincter.

The clinic in Hochfranken, Bavaria, has since suspended the surgical team.

Now the woman is planning to sue the hospital. She still needs the leg operation and is searching for another hospital to do it.

I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

So many jokes, so little time...

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

If one wishes to be truly anal, the proper term is "two ani".

YOu're not kidding. 27 years with my second, this month.




t.

tlynn78 wrote:YOu're not kidding. 27 years with my second, this month.




t.

<LOL>

I've always heard the phrase "tearing somebody a new a**hole", but that is ridiculous!

thguy65 wrote:

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

If one wishes to be truly anal, the proper term is "two ani".

I hope she got the Yul Brynner model, as popularized by "The King An' I."

thguy65 wrote:

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

If one wishes to be truly anal, the proper term is "two ani".

Wouldn't it be anii?

earendel wrote:Wouldn't it be anii?

No. What makes you think that?

So little time indeed

The plural of anus is [fill in the blank]

for example:

The plural of anus is ........... Congress

Apropos of two asses:

RAILROAD TRACKS

THIS IS GREAT Read on......unbelievable
Be sure to read the final paragraph, but your understanding of it will depend on the earlier part of the content. This is amazing and very funny. . .

The US standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That's an exceedingly odd number.

Why was that gauge used? Because that's the way they built them in England , and English expatriates built the US railroads

Why did the English build them like that? B ecause the first rail lines were built by the same people who built the pre-railroad tramways, and that's the gauge they used.

Why did 'they' use that gauge then? Because the people who built the tramways used the same jigs and tools that they used for building wagons, which used that wheel spacing.

Why did the wagons have that particular odd wheel spacing? Well, if they tried to use any other spacing, the wagon wheels would break on some of the old, long distance roads in England , because that's the spacing of the wheel ruts.

So who built those old rutted roads? Imperial Rome built the first long distance roads in Europe (and England ) for their legions. The roads have been used ever since.

And the ruts in the roads? Roman war chariots formed the initial ruts, which everyone else had to match for fear of destroying their wagon wheels. Since the chariots were made for Imperial Rome, they were all alike in the matter of wheel spacing. Therefore the United States standard railroad gauge of 4 feet, 8.5 inches is derived from the original specifications for an Imperial Roman war chariot. Bureaucracies live forever.


So the next time you are handed a Specification/ Procedure/ Process and wonder 'What horse's ass came up with it?' you may be exactly right.

Imperial Roman army chariots were made just wide enough to accommodate the rear ends of two war horses. (Two horses' asses.) Now, the twist to the story:


When you see a Space Shuttle sitting on its launch pad, there are two big booster rockets attached to the sides of the main fuel tank. These are solid rocket boosters, or SRBs. The SRBs are made by Thiokol at their factory in Utah . The engineers who designed the SRBs would have preferred to make them a bit fatter, but the SRBs had to be shipped by train from the factory to the launch site. The railroad line from the factory happens to run through a tunnel in the mountains, and the SRBs had to fit through that tunnel. The tunnel is slightly wider than the railroad track, and the railroad track, as you now know, is about as wide as two horses' behinds.


So, a major Space Shuttle design feature of what is arguably the world's most advanced transportation system was determined over two thousand years ago by the width of a horse's ass.


And you thought being a horse's ass wasn't important? Ancient horse's asses control almost everything....and CURRENT Horses Asses are controlling everything else!!

earendel wrote:Wouldn't it be anii?

I guess you're extrapolating from 1 Radius ---> 2 Radii
But since it isn't 1 Anius, then they aren't 2 Anii.

Speaking of anal, when something is too good to check, I can't let it go



http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000218.html

Uly's story is entertaining but not true:

http://www.snopes.com/history/american/gauge.asp

Speaking of anal, when something is too good to check, I can't let it go



http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000218.html

Uly's story is entertaining but not true:

http://www.snopes.com/history/american/gauge.asp

Hey quit beating a couple of dead horses!

Where's that merryman when justice is needed!

ulysses5019 wrote:

Speaking of anal, when something is too good to check, I can't let it go



http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000218.html

Uly's story is entertaining but not true:

http://www.snopes.com/history/american/gauge.asp

Hey quit beating a couple of dead horses!

Where's that merryman when justice is needed!

lol!

thguy65 wrote:

earendel wrote:Wouldn't it be anii?

I guess you're extrapolating from 1 Radius ---> 2 Radii
But since it isn't 1 Anius, then they aren't 2 Anii.

Does this mean that the two-footers who post here are genii?

I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus.

well........some need one to talk out of while doing their business.

ulysses5019 wrote:

Speaking of anal, when something is too good to check, I can't let it go



http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000218.html

Uly's story is entertaining but not true:

http://www.snopes.com/history/american/gauge.asp

Hey quit beating a couple of dead horses!

Where's that merryman when justice is needed!

I was trying to get one of my compadres up here to join me so y'all could do some measuring, but they're all busy. Some people named McCain, Obama & Clinton asked for their services. 'Bout every four years, we get real busy.

Maybe this shoulda happened to Bill Clinton.



Then he could have two asses to talk out of.

thguy65 wrote:

earendel wrote:Wouldn't it be anii?

I guess you're extrapolating from 1 Radius ---> 2 Radii
But since it isn't 1 Anius, then they aren't 2 Anii.

What if he's extrapolating from 1 octopus ---> 2 octopii, or 1 cactus ---> 2 cactii?

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:I assume that the doctors at least got rid of the old anus. It would be inconvenient to have two anuses.

Not to put a damper on the frivolity but evidently the woman was having continence issues and the surgeons were supposed to perform an operation that would tighten her sphincter or somehow give her better control.

Estonut wrote:

thguy65 wrote:

earendel wrote:Wouldn't it be anii?

I guess you're extrapolating from 1 Radius ---> 2 Radii
But since it isn't 1 Anius, then they aren't 2 Anii.

What if he's extrapolating from 1 octopus ---> 2 octopii, or 1 cactus ---> 2 cactii?

Nope -- octopi, cacti, hippopotami, etc.

Tocqueville3 wrote:Maybe this shoulda happened to Bill Clinton.



Then he could have two asses to talk out of.

He does: Hillary!