The forum for general posting. Come join the madness.
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PlacentiaSoccerMom
- Posts: 8134
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 10:47 am
- Location: Placentia, CA
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#1
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by PlacentiaSoccerMom » Mon Feb 04, 2008 11:05 pm
Maddie told me this joke today.
So a baby seal walks into a club...
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#3
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by ne1410s » Tue Feb 05, 2008 10:10 am
Two Democrats walked into a bar.
The Republican ducked.
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
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Bob Juch
- Posts: 26512
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 11:58 am
- Location: Oro Valley, Arizona
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#4
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by Bob Juch » Tue Feb 05, 2008 10:17 am
A priest, a minister and a rabbi walked into a bar.
The bartender said, "What? You guys again?"
I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.
- Douglas Adams (1952 - 2001)
Si fractum non sit, noli id reficere.
Teach a child to be polite and courteous in the home and, when he grows up, he'll never be able to drive in New Jersey.
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jsuchard
- Posts: 295
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 11:01 am
- Location: Close enough to Disneyland to hear the fireworks
#5
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by jsuchard » Tue Feb 05, 2008 10:56 am
So this dyslexic walks into a bra...
* Either Arglebargle IV or someone else.
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andrewjackson
- Posts: 3945
- Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 12:33 pm
- Location: Planet 10
#6
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by andrewjackson » Tue Feb 05, 2008 11:56 am
The world's greatest magician walked down a street and turned into a bar.
No matter where you go, there you are.
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#7
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by ne1410s » Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:16 pm
My uncle knew the exact time and day he would die.
"How?"
The judge told him.
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
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wbtravis007
- Posts: 1395
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 12:15 pm
- Location: Skipperville, Tx.
#8
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by wbtravis007 » Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:42 pm
I was talking to the duck.
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wbtravis007
- Posts: 1395
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 12:15 pm
- Location: Skipperville, Tx.
#9
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by wbtravis007 » Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:46 pm
All I know is that I don't want me none of them God-damned scrambled eggs.
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wbtravis007
- Posts: 1395
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 12:15 pm
- Location: Skipperville, Tx.
#10
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by wbtravis007 » Tue Feb 05, 2008 12:47 pm
wbtravis007 wrote:All I know is that I don't want me none of them God-damned scrambled eggs.
Or any of them minnow paws, either.
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#11
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by ne1410s » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:32 pm
"I don't think I can stand 67 more of those sonzabitches!"
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
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gsabc
- Posts: 6487
- Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2007 8:03 am
- Location: Federal Bureaucracy City
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#12
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by gsabc » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:39 pm
A man walked into a bar.
Facial damage was minor.
I just ordered chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#13
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by ne1410s » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:40 pm
Termite walks into a tavern and asks,"Is the bar tender here?"
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
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VAdame
- Posts: 1877
- Joined: Wed Oct 10, 2007 11:42 am
- Location: da 'Burgh!
#14
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by VAdame » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:41 pm
ne1410s wrote:
"I don't think I can stand 67 more of those sonzabitches!"
I'm going HOME! Who can f*** in this weather?!
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#16
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by ne1410s » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:49 pm
No, No!! You put the potato in the FRONT of your shorts.
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
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NellyLunatic1980
- Posts: 7935
- Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2007 3:54 am
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#17
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by NellyLunatic1980 » Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:57 pm
What's the difference between a pickpocket and a Peeping Tom?
A pickpocket snatches watches
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ToLiveIsToFly
- Posts: 2364
- Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2007 11:34 am
- Location: Kalamazoo
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#18
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by ToLiveIsToFly » Tue Feb 05, 2008 6:24 pm
John Kerry walks into a bar
Why the long face?
[/spoiler]
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ToLiveIsToFly
- Posts: 2364
- Joined: Thu Oct 11, 2007 11:34 am
- Location: Kalamazoo
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#19
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by ToLiveIsToFly » Tue Feb 05, 2008 6:24 pm
... I couldn't find her head anywhere!
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minimetoo26
- Royal Pain In Everyone's Ass
- Posts: 7874
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 8:51 am
- Location: No Fixed Address
#20
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by minimetoo26 » Wed Feb 06, 2008 7:16 am
Man walked into a bar. Got a black eye. It was an iron bar.
Must be said deadpan with slight Scottish accent for full effect. Love British humor and loved working with Crazy Tom the Scotsman who provided me with many jokes I couldn't decipher...
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ne1410s
- Posts: 2961
- Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
- Location: The Friendly Confines
#22
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by ne1410s » Wed Feb 06, 2008 9:25 am
Stolen from the NYT:
A report says mailed letters are on the decline. No one at the Post Office was available to give a reason for the decrease. There was only one teller window open and 16 people standing in line.
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."
