WWTBAM Bored

Anyone know the best way to remove what appears to be white spray paint from a concrete driveway? Our driveway was vandalized on Saturday night and so far my efforts to remove have been in vaind. I've tried Acetone (as suggested by the police officer who filed the report), Driveway Kleen, and Crud Cleaner. My dad even had some type of acid that he tried. The paint be slightly fainter with what we've tried, but it is still certainly visible.

Though we can't prove it, the graffiti was likely done by two 14 year old girls who decided to cyber bully our daughter on her Facebook page the night it happened. The bullying included a school locker room threat, and as a result they were in the principal's office first thing yesterday morning. I haven't heard what, if anything, has been done to them beyond that. Thus far, we haven't seen any evidence that our daughter did anything to either of the girls. The reason they attacked her seems to be because of a mutual attraction between our daughter and a boy that one of the two girls was dumped by 2 or 3 months ago.

At any rate, if anyone knows what I should try next to clean our driveway, I'd appreciate it. Having "F.U." in large letters in two spots on the drive is not in keeping with the rest of our decorating.

I'm surprised acetone didn't work. You might try MEK. You'll probably have to have your driveway pressure washed as where the letters were will be lighter.

First step: Go to any home store and get a spray can of graffiti remover. As you would guess, it's made just for this and frequently works - especially if the paint is fairly new. Make sure that you spray beyond the letters as it will also tend to clean the concrete. It will not make much difference to trade out your "FU" from paint to uber clean concrete.

Second step: Rent a pressure washer. Get one that puts out about 2,500 psi or more. Here too, you'll have to feather out how you clean to avoid making the same letters out of a super clean area of the driveway. One plus: Rent it for the day - go crazy cleaning things all around your place that you never could get clean before.

If that doesn't work: Get some heavy duty gel paint remover and let it sit on and around the letters. Then go after it with the pressure washer. WARNING!!!!! IF YOU DO THIS, WEAR 100% COVERAGE AS THE PRESSURE WASHER CAN AND WILL SLING PAINT REMOVER BACK AT YOU. However, this is almost guaranteed to work.

Last ditch effort: think of a catchy, neighborhood-friendly slogan containing the letters 'F' and 'U'. Grab some extra paint and have at it.

Thanks, I'll give it a try.

This looks very good:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0013C ... 81AQASXDW0

Good luck with the grafitti - and more importantly, with the bullying problem. Good job being aware and proactive with it. Some girls are the devil.

t.

TSIO --

Sorry to hear about your little gal's troubles at school and your driveway. Hope the removal advice helps and the bullying stops! I recommend that Ms. Cheesecake read "Queen Bees and Wannabees" . It has some great insights into the young teenage girl mind. I am done (fortunately we survived those years) with my copy and would be glad to pass it on if you are interested, let me know.

Mel

Wow, that is terrible. What did the police say that can be done? Is your daughter ok at school?
Is your driveway asphalt or concrete? If it is asphalt, can you put driveway seal coat on it to cover it? If it is concrete, can you use concrete stain on it? My neighbor had her concrete driveway stained a light brown, but they have all different colors in white, beige, off white etc.
I hope the principal does something to the delinquents. Most school principals are chicken. At my daughter's school 2 boys attacked a third boy (with string and a broom), took pictures and again attacked the kid with a baseball bat. Nothing, but writing an apology letter happened to them. Google Gregory middle school boy attacked, naperville and you can read about it.

The U.S. Education Department has mailed letters to all schools warning that school administrators who fail to act when they are aware of bullying may be subject to prosecution for civil rights violations.

Bob Juch wrote:The U.S. Education Department has mailed letters to all schools warning that school administrators who fail to act when they are aware of bullying may be subject to prosecution for civil rights violations.

When all else fails......... find someone to sue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

lb13

Between the weather and other factors, I haven't had a time to try the graffiti removal advice yet, but I will by the weekend.

As for the other questions that have been posted, I think very little has been done.

From what I have been told, both of the two ringleader girls, who are also the prime suspects in the vandalism, have been spoken to by school counselors and possibly other school staff. They apparently admitted to what they put on Facebook (which was hard to deny when their names and photos were by their comments) and have said they would apologize to our daughter. They have not admitted to the vandalism. The staff told them to steer clear of our daughter for a week or so before apologizing. However, last night they were all at cheerleading practice together and the two girls were laughing and pointing at our daughter, so they are clearly not sorry.

Beyond that, the police basically said that they would do nothing except write up a report. MsCheesecake picked up the report yesterday. It does list the names of the two girls. The police did not visit the families involved.

Also, the school called both sets of parents, but as of the last I heard only one mother has responded. She visited the school and said that her daughter couldn't possibly be involved. They informed her that she was involved and had admitted to having been involved. The other parents haven't even called the school back, at least as far as I know.

At home, this is really putting a strain on my relationship with MsCheesecake. She is pretty much just sitting around obsessing about it. We both would like to see the girls get what is coming to them, but I dealt with bullying growing up and know that is unlikely to happen. She on the other hand has never handled anything like this before. She is having all types of stomach issues as a result. I try to calm her down and I know that could just as easily bite me in the behind. If I manage to calm her down and something happens to our daughter she'll probably never speak to me again.

And to top it all off, on Saturday our son was supposed to spend the day with one of his friends. That included going to dinner with the boy's mother and her fiance. Before they got together, the friend called and said that he and his mother weren't getting along so they could still get together but she wouldn't be joining them for dinner. That was the last we heard about that, until last night. The boy called our house asking if he could stay with us for awhile. Apparently things have escalated. MsCheesecake spoke with him and he told her that if he didn't get away he'd end up blowing his brains out. She is calling the high school this morning to make the counselors aware of the situation and see what they can do to help. He chose to stay at his home last night, but may be at our place tonight. From what I've seen of him, he seems to be a good kid. I would hate for something to happen to him, but the last thing we need right now is more drama around our house.

littlebeast13 wrote:

Bob Juch wrote:The U.S. Education Department has mailed letters to all schools warning that school administrators who fail to act when they are aware of bullying may be subject to prosecution for civil rights violations.

When all else fails......... find someone to sue!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

lb13

Sue? No, federal criminal prosecution.

TheSearchIsOn wrote:And to top it all off, on Saturday our son was supposed to spend the day with one of his friends. That included going to dinner with the boy's mother and her fiance. Before they got together, the friend called and said that he and his mother weren't getting along so they could still get together but she wouldn't be joining them for dinner. That was the last we heard about that, until last night. The boy called our house asking if he could stay with us for awhile. Apparently things have escalated. MsCheesecake spoke with him and he told her that if he didn't get away he'd end up blowing his brains out. She is calling the high school this morning to make the counselors aware of the situation and see what they can do to help. He chose to stay at his home last night, but may be at our place tonight. From what I've seen of him, he seems to be a good kid. I would hate for something to happen to him, but the last thing we need right now is more drama around our house.

I'm not a parent and have no skills or qualifications for giving personal advice, but you'll be doing good, reaching out to your son's friend. And you may be saving his life.

MarleysGh0st wrote: I'm not a parent and have no skills or qualifications for giving personal advice, but you'll be doing good, reaching out to your son's friend. And you may be saving his life.

We intend to do whatever we can to help him. It's just a tough situation all around right now.

And MsCheesecake heard from the school this morning and the parents of the one girl are still blowing this off. They should have a rule that anytime a parent fails to acknowledge a request for them to come into the school for a conference about their child that the child is suspended until they show up. Even if there are legitimate reasons causing them to be unable to come into the school, they should at least have to call to set up the first available date for such a meeting.

Oh, and in my earlier post I said that the girls hadn't admitted to the vandalism. While that is technically true, other students have overheard them bragging about painting our driveway.

I admire and bow to those of you who are raising children/pre-teens/teens in these times.

I have no advice.

I have compassion.

I have to say, none of this is making me look forward to when my kids hit middle school.

This past weekend, I asked my kids if there was any bullying/teasing at their school. They said no. (You see stories in the news about bullying prior to middle school and high school, so I thought i should ask.)

I think (hope) that my kids would not particiapte in bullying, and that they would try to stop bullying and/or help pout the kid being bullied, but you never know if they are faced with the situation. I know how strong peer pressure can be, and I certainly regret inaction by me throughout my years of school.

Anyway, I am sorry to hear that your daughter (and wife) are having to deal with all of this stuff. (Your son's friend, as well)

peacock2121 wrote:I admire and bow to those of you who are raising children/pre-teens/teens in these times.

I have no advice.

I have compassion.

You've been away so probably haven't heard I'm now helping to raise a six year old girl. It's not scary - yet.

You've been away so probably haven't heard I'm now helping to raise a six year old girl. It's not scary - yet.

For you, you mean? Don't let the poor thing see your avatar. THAT thing is creeeeepy.


t.

Do you have a security camera aimed at your driveway in case the girls come back for more?

My daughter knew a friend of the boy that was attacked at her school. He has totally changed his personality. Even with picture evidence the school did nothing. The fathers of the attackers lawyered up and even had the nerve to threaten to sue the victim's parents for "harassment' for speaking at a school board meeting and tv station. The law firm he used did mostly "school law" cases. Who knew that was a specialty? Don't get me started on lawyers!

If it continues how about going to the TV station?

TheSearchIsOn wrote:
From what I have been told, both of the two ringleader girls, who are also the prime suspects in the vandalism, have been spoken to by school counselors and possibly other school staff. They apparently admitted to what they put on Facebook (which was hard to deny when their names and photos were by their comments) and have said they would apologize to our daughter. They have not admitted to the vandalism.

Take them in front of Judge Judy. Other than ripping deadbeat dads a new one and taking welfare cheats down a peg, there's nothing she likes better than putting the Fear of JJ into schoolchildren who think they're the shiz. She also takes Facebook printouts as evidence and texts as evidence now (as long as Byrd helps her with them).

tlynn78 wrote:

You've been away so probably haven't heard I'm now helping to raise a six year old girl. It's not scary - yet.

For you, you mean? Don't let the poor thing see your avatar. THAT thing is creeeeepy.


t.

Josie likes the Dali Llama but likes ES's drawings even more - that's scary!

My wish for MsCheesecake is that she can find some peace, but I believe there is virtually no chance it will come from anything the parents do. There was a recent incident where some college students pulled a stunt that got them suspended for the remainder of that semester. They had to re-take those classes right from the start, plus pay for the damages. Only two of the parents stepped up; the rest took the attitude that their children couldn't possibly be involved in something like that. One mother went so far as to threaten a lawsuit against the school for overly harsh treatment. Then the parents got a look at a photo on Facebook of their little angel participating in the stunt. I don't have any respect for the person who posted a photo of a classmate on her worst behavior, he could have sent it to the school administration and the parents privately, even anonymously. It did kill the lawsuit.

Swallow any lie, deny any fact -- heck yes, if it means they don't have to deal with it and with the gaps in their parenting.

There was a Luann comic strip story a while back where Tiffany anonymously posts a photo of Luann in her underwear in the locker room. Tiffany denies it until Gunther does some sleuthing in the photo and enhances a reflected image of Tiffany taking the photo with her cell phone. She's suspended and loses her "Miss Chamber of Commerce" title. I wish there would be that kind of justice for the kids who are making life miserable for your daughter and wife. Sending my best wishes for a good outcome ...

TSIO-

Have you had a face-to-face meeting at the school with the admin? If not schedule it ASAP. They need to take this very seriously. Did you file a police report of vandalism? If not do so ASAP. I wore purple in support of those being bullied and it is not limited to those who are considered gay/lesbian.

It is a hot button now and if you are not getting the appropriate response calling people like the Board of Ed and filing a complaint is very reasonable.

I will be calling Son1111's school tomorrow. During school today his assigned locker was broken into and his 2 bags of gear were stolen. Football pads, shoes, Underarmor, T-shirt, etc. Major PITA and an outlay of money etc. But the thing is his locker had been assigned to 2 people at the start of the year. So although Son1111 never gave his locker combination # to anyone, the school had. I do not believe that the other student stole his stuff, we know him, but I can not say for sure that the combination wasn't given away by the school or the student.

Although for the life of me why anyone would even consider stealing all his stinky stuff is beyond me. My only guess was someone wanted to be a football player for Halloween.

Oh, and they left all the text books.

christie1111 wrote:TSIO-

Have you had a face-to-face meeting at the school with the admin? If not schedule it ASAP. They need to take this very seriously.

MsCheesecake has been at the school, but I think only speaking with counselors. I'll ask her who else she could talk to about it.

christie1111 wrote:Did you file a police report of vandalism? If not do so ASAP.

Yes, we called them the same day we discovered it. The officer that responded asked if we had suspicions of who had done it and we showed him the pages we had printed from Facebook. He took down the names of the two girls, but said that unless something else happened the only thing that the police would be doing is filing the report. We have a copy of the police report and it has the names of the girls on it.

christie1111 wrote:I wore purple in support of those being bullied and it is not limited to those who are considered gay/lesbian.

It is a hot button now and if you are not getting the appropriate response calling people like the Board of Ed and filing a complaint is very reasonable.

I will be calling Son1111's school tomorrow. During school today his assigned locker was broken into and his 2 bags of gear were stolen. Football pads, shoes, Underarmor, T-shirt, etc. Major PITA and an outlay of money etc. But the thing is his locker had been assigned to 2 people at the start of the year. So although Son1111 never gave his locker combination # to anyone, the school had. I do not believe that the other student stole his stuff, we know him, but I can not say for sure that the combination wasn't given away by the school or the student.

Although for the life of me why anyone would even consider stealing all his stinky stuff is beyond me. My only guess was someone wanted to be a football player for Halloween.

Oh, and they left all the text books.

My locker was broken into back in high school as well. Some kid was actually standing around in the halls looking over people's shoulders trying to peek at combinations and managed to see mine somehow. All that was taken was a hooded jacket. It was a red hooded jacket and the zipper had ripped out of it. My mom replaced the zipper with a black zipper instead of a red since our school colors were red and black. As such, the jacket was one-of-a-kind and was returned when someone walked through the school counselors' area wearing it. Hope things work out for your son.

In other news, we have a house-guest for the weekend. Anyone have any advice for how much to get involved with the situation between this boy and his mother? I'm not sure if we should just offer him shelter or if we should pry a bit to see if we can persuade him that things aren't as bad as they seem at home.

TheSearchIsOn wrote:In other news, we have a house-guest for the weekend. Anyone have any advice for how much to get involved with the situation between this boy and his mother? I'm not sure if we should just offer him shelter or if we should pry a bit to see if we can persuade him that things aren't as bad as they seem at home.

You won't know that things aren't as bad as they seem without more details, but I'd suggest that any prying be very gentle. Maybe more of just giving him the opportunity to open up. Thanks for opening your home to him!

Did MsCheesecake tell the school counselors about his situation? Did they have any suggestions?