WWTBAM Bored

I do not know how people found the time to research all the decisions they made for their weddings before the Internet era. Maybe lives really were simpler - jobs that were really 9 to 5, short commutes, nearby family and friends to help out, a wider range of friends and acquaintances for recommendations, (dare I say it) a one-earner family where a stay-at-home mom could help out and make the necessary calls and trips ... I dunno. My point is that now, there are just too many options available for each and every choice to be made.

Example: Once I located bridal shops in the phone book, there were eleven just in my suburban phone district (ten, not counting the one place we already knew was crap). The Yellow Pages from where I work gave another five unique places (one overlap from a second store). And these are the smaller phonebooks. We live in a major metropolitan area, which means there are probably around one hundred places from which to buy a wedding gown within an hour's drive. This is only ONE decision point!! Multiply this by the number of other choices to be made, and there isn't enough time in the day. Or in weeks, for that matter. This is obviously why wedding planners are so common today, whereas before they were solely for the rich and fatuous and their million-dollar extravaganzas.

Back in the day - like when I got married the first time - the only access to dresses was my local bridal shop. Back in 1978, we had exactly 2. Brides went in and tried on dresses, as far as I knew. Some had a bridal magazine and said they wanted 'one like this' and never expected to get 'that one'.

The internet has made things harder and easier all at the same time.

gsabc wrote:I do not know how people found the time to research all the decisions they made for their weddings before the Internet era. Maybe lives really were simpler - jobs that were really 9 to 5, short commutes, nearby family and friends to help out, a wider range of friends and acquaintances for recommendations, (dare I say it) a one-earner family where a stay-at-home mom could help out and make the necessary calls and trips ... I dunno. My point is that now, there are just too many options available for each and every choice to be made.

Example: Once I located bridal shops in the phone book, there were eleven just in my suburban phone district (ten, not counting the one place we already knew was crap). The Yellow Pages from where I work gave another five unique places (one overlap from a second store). And these are the smaller phonebooks. We live in a major metropolitan area, which means there are probably around one hundred places from which to buy a wedding gown within an hour's drive. This is only ONE decision point!! Multiply this by the number of other choices to be made, and there isn't enough time in the day. Or in weeks, for that matter. This is obviously why wedding planners are so common today, whereas before they were solely for the rich and fatuous and their million-dollar extravaganzas.

I guess that I was on the other end of things, but I really do not recall my wife (or her mother) stressing over any of the various "decisions" that needed to be made when we got married for the first (and last) time. Maybe they did some of the legwork "pre-engagement", plus we had about an 18 month engagement.

Anyway, many of those decisions (flowers, photographer, cake, etc) really come from asking for names when we attended other people's weddings.

I think that sometimes people are consumed about thought about the wedding and don't think about the marriage. You really have to work hard for "happily ever after." The first year, for me, was the most difficult of my marriage.

gsabc wrote:I do not know how people found the time to research all the decisions they made for their weddings before the Internet era. Maybe lives really were simpler - jobs that were really 9 to 5, short commutes, nearby family and friends to help out, a wider range of friends and acquaintances for recommendations, (dare I say it) a one-earner family where a stay-at-home mom could help out and make the necessary calls and trips ... I dunno. My point is that now, there are just too many options available for each and every choice to be made.

I think you've got it about right - it's a matter of the available time. I would add that it's also a matter of how extravagant the wedding is going to be. When elwing and I married in 1972 she took care of a lot of the arrangements herself (her mother and father trusted her judgment and frugality) and involved people from her (later our) church. She made her own wedding dress and helped make the bridesmaids' dresses also. The reception was nothing fancy - just punch and cake and nuts and mints.