WWTBAM Bored

Bob Juch's "I can haz cheezburger" avatar prompted me to do a little online investigating, and I have discovered the world of "lolcats". More than that, I've even found a site where the Bible is being translated into "lolcatspeak". For instance, the Ten Commandments rendered into "lolcatspeak" looks like this:

1 Then Ceiling Cat spoked all them werds:

2 I iz Ceiling Cat An I iz Top Cat, An I broughted u out of hawt lend wit no cheezbrgrs for hard werk at all

3 No can has other ceiling cat!! U gotz other Ceiling Cat, I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes.

4 If u try be Ceiling Cat of any of mai creayshunz up in floaty skai, down in erth or in watr or I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes.5 If u think faek Ceiling Cat iz Ceiling Cat, I mek u ded An ur children ded An ur children-children ded, for being stupid.6 If not I wuv u An all ur childrenz-childrenz-childrenz!

7 U sez Ceiling Cat bad, I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes, for I dun liek it. Srsly.

8 Remembur caturday An keep holy.9 U werk 6 dais An finish werk, K?10 Caturday, u no werk. U An all ur peepz go wrship me.11 I maded heavenz An erth An see An the stuff that does teh funney hoppey stuffz in An on it - so I make it holy cuz I no werk.

12 Bez u good to papa An mama so u has long lief.

13 U no mek peepz ded!

14 U no mek sexxes wit other gurlz or menz than ur wief (so no awsum treesum alowed!).

15 U no tek stuffs for free if not getz for free.

16 U no tell bad stuff about ur neibor.

17 U no wantz neibor stuff! No wief, no gurlz, no menz, no animulz, NO BUKKITZ! NOT YOURS.

I love LOLCats. I love them. They make me happy.

Hmmm....

Maybe I can get my youth group to memorize verses from this version with more success than the NIV version we are using now.

Jeff said that the "I can haz cheezburger" cat just died. I don't know if this is a urban myth.

My girls love the cats.

I don't know if you saw my post from a few weeks ago, here is a link to the LOL Cat Bible:
http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Genesis_1

I like how they call "God" the "Ceiling Cat."

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
I like how they call "God" the "Ceiling Cat."

We refer to her as the Way Up High Cat.

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:Jeff said that the "I can haz cheezburger" cat just died. I don't know if this is a urban myth.

My girls love the cats.

I don't know if you saw my post from a few weeks ago, here is a link to the LOL Cat Bible:
http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Genesis_1

I like how they call "God" the "Ceiling Cat."

O.K. Pslam 23 is not suppose to make you laught, but verse 1 on this version made me LOL..


Ceiling Cat iz mai sheprd (which is funni if u knowz teh joek about herdin catz LOL.)
He givz me evrithin I need.

2 He letz me sleeps in teh sunni spot
an haz liek nice waterz r ovar thar.

3 He makez mai soul happi
an maeks sure I go teh riet wai for him. Liek thru teh cat flap insted of out teh opin windo LOL.

4 I iz in teh valli of dogz, fearin no pooch,
bcz Ceiling Cat iz besied me rubbin' mah ears, an it maek me so kumfy.

5 He letz me sit at teh taebl evn when peepl who duzint liek me iz watchn.
He givz me a flea baff an so much gooshy fud it runz out of mai bowl LOL.

6 Niec things an luck wil chase me evrydai
an I wil liv in teh Ceiling Cats houz forevr

BackInTex wrote:

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:Jeff said that the "I can haz cheezburger" cat just died. I don't know if this is a urban myth.

My girls love the cats.

I don't know if you saw my post from a few weeks ago, here is a link to the LOL Cat Bible:
http://www.lolcatbible.com/index.php?title=Genesis_1

I like how they call "God" the "Ceiling Cat."

O.K. Pslam 23 is not suppose to make you laught, but verse 1 on this version made me LOL..


Ceiling Cat iz mai sheprd (which is funni if u knowz teh joek about herdin catz LOL.)
He givz me evrithin I need.

2 He letz me sleeps in teh sunni spot
an haz liek nice waterz r ovar thar.

3 He makez mai soul happi
an maeks sure I go teh riet wai for him. Liek thru teh cat flap insted of out teh opin windo LOL.

4 I iz in teh valli of dogz, fearin no pooch,
bcz Ceiling Cat iz besied me rubbin' mah ears, an it maek me so kumfy.

5 He letz me sit at teh taebl evn when peepl who duzint liek me iz watchn.
He givz me a flea baff an so much gooshy fud it runz out of mai bowl LOL.

6 Niec things an luck wil chase me evrydai
an I wil liv in teh Ceiling Cats houz forevr

When I found out about the LOL Cat Bible, the first thing I checked out was the 23rd Psalm.

Lolcats.

LOL!

Had never heard of them...so you're not the only one who missed this trend, ear.

7 U sez Ceiling Cat bad, I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes, for I dun liek it. Srsly.

This is seriously funny!!!

Matthew 1

1 Dis book of genie-ologee of Jesuz Christ, son of David, son of Abraham:2 Abraham maded Isaac, Isaac maded Jacob, Jacob maded Judah and hiz bros.3 Judah maded Perez and Zerah wit Tamar. Perez maded Hezron, and Hezron maded Ram.4 Ram maded Amminadab, Amminadab maded Nashon and Nashon maded Salmon. Not liek the fish, lol.5 Salmon maded Boaz, Boaz maded Obed by umpsing Ruth, Obed maded Jesse6 and Jesse maded King David teh king. King David teh king maded Solomon by umpsing sum chick that used to made peoples wit Uriah. Lol, Uriah got pwned.7 Solomon maded Rehoboam, Rehoboam maded Abijah and Abijah maded Asa.8 Asa maded Jehoshaphat, and he maded Jehoram and Jehoram maded Uzziah.9 Uzziah maded Jotham, Jotham maded Ahaz and Ahaz maded Hezekiah.10 Hezekiah maded Manasseh, Manasseh maded Amon and Amon maded Josiah.11 Josiah maded Jeconiah and hiz bros, was bout when they was carryeded to Babblylon.12 And after they was in Babblylon Jeconiah maded Shealtiel, and Shealtiel maded Zerubbabel13 Zerubbabel maded Abiud, Abiud maded Eliakim and Eliakim maded Azor.14 Azor maded Zadok, Zadok maded Akim and Akim maded Eliud.15 Eliud maded Eleazar, Eleazar maded Matthan and Matthan maded Jacob.16 And Jacob maded Joseph. dat wuz alot uv baybi makinn. Joseph was teh mister of Mary, and she maded Jesus, who gets called Christ, liek all teh time. Srsly.17 So all teh genenerayshuns from Abraham to David am 14 genenerayshuns, frm David to gettin lockeded up in Babblylon am 14 genenerayshuns, and frm gettin lockeded up in Babblylon to teh Christ am 14 genenerayshuns. Srsly.


18 Now, teh burth of teh Christ was liek dis: After Marry and Joseph waz all "We's gonna get marrieded, kthnx", but before dey could had hankiez pankiez Mary was all pr3ggerz from Teh Forse.19 Joseph was liek "I has virjn - NOOOO dey be stealin my virjn! Must hied hur".20 But when he was tihnkin, zomg, a WallCat frm Ceiling Cat was liek, "Oh hai! I'm in ur dreemz, givin u messij. Don't be scairdy cat. Take Mary as ur wife - is virjn. But teh Forse is strong in tihs wun, lol! HoverCat is on hur, givn hur feetus, srsly.21 "And she gonna made a son, and you gonna call him Jeezus, cuz he save kittehs frum bein bad kittehs. Kthxbai."22 So all dis was all did cuz Ceiling Cat had sed it wud be. His proffet was all liek:23 "Hay guise, look! teh virjn iz all pr3ggers, and dey gonna call him Immanuel", dat be joospeek for "Ceiling Cat wit us"24 Then Joseph waked up, done wat teh angel frm Ceiling Cat tolded him to, and was all liek "U wit me now lol" at Mary.25 And dey didnt has teh HARBL GOES WHERE!?!? til affer dey gets a son and calleded him Jeezus. Ktnx.

Song of Solomon

1 Solomones Songz of Songz, kthx.

Teh Beluved:
2 Let him kiss me wit da kissus of hiz mouf--
for yer love be moar delitefool den cheezbugers. Srsly.

3 Yu has a flavr I likez;
yer name is like smellz poorded out.
Deh oter sluts luv yu too!

4 Take me wit yu plz, come on!
Letz go! the king bringme into hiz chamburz, k?


Here's another:

I luvz u;
u stoleded mai hart
wif ur briet eyez,
an ur sparkli collar.

10 Luvin u iz so graet,
bettr dan drinkin wien,
an u smel niec too.

11 Ur lipz haz a flavor
an so duz ur tung.
U smell realli good.

I have never heard of it, either. Unlike the daring earendel, I am delving no further. Just trying to read these posts started a stabbing pain behind my right eye. (I think it's sort of like epilepsy and red.)

I didn't even attempt to skim the last two. Ouch!

PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:
When I found out about the LOL Cat Bible, the first thing I checked out was the 23rd Psalm.

Heh. I made straight for 1 Corinthians 13:

1 iff i talkd wif teh tungz of manz n angylz, n duzzn haz luff, i are becom liek teh human, knockin down all teh potz n panz frm teh shelf, srsly.2 iff i haz powarz of liek tellin the futurez an, an i gotz all teh missteriez an all teh knowingz an all teh faithz, enuff 2 taek all teh mowntanz awayz, an i duzzn haz luff, i gotz nuffink.3 an evn iff i givez all mai stuffz awai, n iff i delivur mai bodiz to b burnded up, and i duzzn haz luff, i gotz nuffink.

4 luv is pashient n kind, luv haz no jelusniss or showin offz, luv no is stuck-up5 or r00dz. Luv no insistzes on doin it rite, itz not pisst off alla tiem or rezentfluffle.6 luv izzn all happiez about doin it wrong, but is happiez about teh truthz.7 luv putz up wiht all teh stuffz, beelivez all teh stuffz, hoepz for all teh stuffz. Luv putz up wiht all teh stuffz. i sed that areddy.

8 luv no haz endingz. Tellin the futurez, tungz, an alla stuffz u know wil die.9 we haz knowingz a bit, an we haz profacy a bit. We no haz 2 much tho.10 o, wait. wen teh perfict coemz, teh not perfict will dyez, lolol.11 wen i wuz a kitten, i meweded leik a kitten, thinkded liek a kittenz, an I chazed strings liek a kittenz. wen i wuz becomez a cat, i NOT WANT kitten waiz ne moar.12 for nao we see in teh foggy mirorr like when teh human gets out of teh shower, but tehn we see faec tow faec. Nao i haz knowingz just a bit, tehn i will haz all teh knowingz, as i haz been knownz.

13 nao faithz an hoepz an luvs r hear, theses threes, but teh bestest iz teh luvs, srsly.

...wachin u post.

U be good or I shoot yous wit mah lazer eyes. Kbye.

I have very much enjoyed Proof of Ceiling Cat, which also addresses arguments against the existence of Ceiling Cat, including this one:

Awgooments frum Atheist

He, liek, nevr duz anyfing. An der iz lots ov bad fings in wurldz. Liek, I wuz in teh best warm spot on teh rug, but den it moovd, an Iz cood not be in it anymoar. WAI, CEILING CAT, WAI??? WAI YU SO CROOL??? So, he not exist. Also, evolooshun iz lots bettr. Cuz den Iz evolvd frum teh tigrs. RAWR! ME EETS YU!

My side is hurting from laughing.

When HoltDad sees this he's gonna tell us were all going to hell.

Jeemie wrote:Lolcats.

LOL!

Had never heard of them...so you're not the only one who missed this trend, ear.

Neither had I. I thought Bob was just playing off bbking's old signature....

lb13

Tocqueville3 wrote:My side is hurting from laughing.

When HoltDad sees this he's gonna tell us were all going to hell.

Well, not for the butchering of the Bible, but for the substances everyone has apparently been smoking to find this stuff funny.

Ya know, it all sounds so racist to me. Ain't that the kittenz mittenz??

I guess it's too late to have Steppen Fetchit do the oral book...

ohai. Iz in ur thred skoolin teh kranky peeplz. Srsly.

ne1410s wrote:Ya know, it all sounds so racist to me. Ain't that the kittenz mittenz??

I guess it's too late to have Steppen Fetchit do the oral book...

Tennis man, I think it's more derived out of younger persons' text messaging, abbreviating, and like that. Slang. If you check out the site you'll see actual words, too.

Tennis man, I think it's more derived out of younger persons' text messaging, abbreviating, and like that. Slang. If you check out the site you'll see actual words, too.

Thanks, beebs. I appreciate that.

ne1410s wrote:

Tennis man, I think it's more derived out of younger persons' text messaging, abbreviating, and like that. Slang. If you check out the site you'll see actual words, too.

Thanks, beebs. I appreciate that.

Not to say that it's not all frivolous and goofy. But, for some reason I'm just pleased by these lolcats. It's all just stupid. I love it.

TheCalvinator24 wrote:

Tocqueville3 wrote:My side is hurting from laughing.

When HoltDad sees this he's gonna tell us were all going to hell.

Well, not for the butchering of the Bible, but for the substances everyone has apparently been smoking to find this stuff funny.

I don't think the Chantix works on *that* stuff.

FWIW, I think, hey, maybe it's a little wacky but it does get some people who would never read the Bible at all to take in a verse or two, maybe something will stick. I prefer the NIV, sure, but I think the LOLCat translation is amusing. I like looking up my favorite verses to see what they are in lolcat.