WWTBAM Bored

My dear Flyguy:

Your application for the position of Personal Pilot on Kay's private plane has been received and evaluated. You may inspect the plane (on order) here:

http://www.flexjet.com/Our-Aircraft/CL605/index.html

We hereby would like to offer you this position. Your beginning salary will be E$1.5 million per annum (that's one-point-five-million Elven Dollars per year), with working hours to be determined by the necessity and whim of Lady Kay. (Just between you and me, I suspect she has so many frequent flyer miles to use up on those large commercial airlines, she probably won't even bother you all that soon or often.)

I see no difficulty with your wife coming along for any or all future trips. Kay is all about aesthetics in her pilot's appearance, but Santa's naughty-and-nice list shows her with no known proclivity to interfere with said pilot's personal relationships. In fact, if your wife likes shopping -- and especially for shoes -- she will become an important member of Kay's circle of friends.

Please say yes. We look forward to hearing from you. Merry Christmas to you and yours.

Sincerely,
Kandy KAYne
Elf in charge of Ms. Harris

P.S. I'm sure you are curious about the exchange rate between Elven Dollars and U.S. Dollars. Although I don't have the exact numbers handy, I'm sure that information is available somewhere on the internet.

Ma'am,

I am pleased that you considered me for the position, but I must regretfully decline.

When I first considered the position, I was unaware that elves were actually involved. Due to a long family history of conflict with such creatures, I would have to choose between the job and my family.

That really is no choice although I hope that one day we all, elves and humans, can live together in peace.

v/r,
Brick

P.S. Sweet jet!

Flybrick wrote:Ma'am,

I am pleased that you considered me for the position, but I must regretfully decline.

When I first considered the position, I was unaware that elves were actually involved. Due to a long family history of conflict with such creatures, I would have to choose between the job and my family.

That really is no choice although I hope that one day we all, elves and humans, can live together in peace.

v/r,
Brick

P.S. Sweet jet!

Oh, no, Mr. Brick. I'm am saddened and astonished to hear of your family history with elves. Because I consider elves to be of the highest ethical quality, I cannot help but wonder if perhaps your family's mishaps may have transpired during dealings with a non-elf -- a leprechaun, say, or a genie -- who was passing himself off as an elf. It is a mystery to me. I beg you to reconsider.

To that end, I will take the liberty of quoting an old leprechaun adage: "There's no such thing as 'no'; there's only "not enough." I have been authorized to increase your offer to E$3 million per annum (three million elfen dollars per year.) In addition, we can sweeten the health insurance plan and boost the $401K plan to improve the financial outlook for your retirement years.

What do you say?

Sincerely,
Kandy KAYne
Special holiday assistant to Miss Harris