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Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:36 pm
by sunflower
Since there has been SO much conversation about me, I figured why not finally chime in…
I sent a rather lengthy note to someone who came to me directly and personally, on my personal friend philosophy on Facebook (and to that person, thank you for asking instead of jumping on the “sunflower must be evil and mean” bandwagon). I will not quote that all here but will simply say it is my right to choose who I have as friends on Facebook. It is not up for discussion, debate or vote. Contrary to what some seem to believe, my Facebook page (or any other social networking account I have outside the Bored for that matter) is not governed by some Bored faction that thinks that they are entitled to dictate who I am friends with and/or how I choose to correspond with people.
It is my right to distinguish between different levels of “friendship”. I consider Facebook to be an inner circle of people in my life…those I correspond with regularly, or are very close to me in one way or another. I have acquaintances in my life, who I like very much, who are not my friends on Facebook (for example, my co-workers - my personal rule is no current co-workers as Facebook friends). I do not consider this a slight, but just do not find them in that inner circle. I routinely go through my friends list every 2 or 3 months and take people out that I don’t find myself interacting with, or that I don’t feel that close to. It's easy to click on the "confirm friend request" button and then later find you don't have much in common with, or rarely speak with, that person. That's why Facebook lets you make changes and doesn't lock you in for life.
I have a lot of personal stuff on Facebook, and I feel it is okay for me to limit that to my closer friends and not necessarily extend it to the wider acquaintance circle. I feel it is okay for me to have people here that I like and exchange pleasantries with, but that I don’t have as Facebook friends. And I feel that I don’t really care if people don’t agree with that. Maintain your Facebook page in whatever way you like, this is how I maintain mine.
I will also say I am not the first Bored member to unfriend people from the Bored, choosing to keep a Facebook page to a certain subset of friends. I will not call anyone out, but if anyone wants to offer up a personal story in support of this position, I would certainly be appreciative.
So that’s the real answer. I know it is not as scandalous or controversial as what you all concocted in my absence, but it’s the truth. So sorry to burst your collective bubble…
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:43 pm
by ToLiveIsToFly
Jesus Christ, you're getting abuse for this?
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:47 pm
by PlacentiaSoccerMom
I don't know all of the details of what's going on, but I am glad that I am still your Facebook friend.
I have a story to offer.
Maddie was asked to be the friend of somebody on her Quiz Bowl team. She didn't care for his personality, but accepted anyway since so many people on the team were friends. At one of the tournaments the regular captain was gone and Maddie was picked to captain. She did an awesome job, coming in second in personal stats. This person thought that he would be captain the second half, but Maddie was having such a good day and he was not, so the coach kept Maddie in as captain. During the second part of the day, he said things to Maddie like "why don't you let one of the guys do the math questions..." after she buzzed in on an almost dead question. Maddie is fast on computational math and has done well on these questions for her team, so the comment was totally out of line, particularly since nobody else was buzzing in and her guess didn't cost the team anything This kid also made a comment about me and the coach "disappearing together." I didn't realize that we were disappearing together, I just like using the bathroom between rounds. He was telling people that Maddie "liked" him. She doesn't like him.
Anyway, Maddie had it and decided that he wasn't a friend and she didn't want him to have access to her Facebook page so she unfriended him. She hasn't regretted it.
Sometimes you just have to move on.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:53 pm
by ghostjmf
This is completely hysterical.
Welcome to kindergarten.
Nah, make that "toddler romp".
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:54 pm
by MarleysGh0st
sunflower wrote:I will also say I am not the first Bored member to unfriend people from the Bored, choosing to keep a Facebook page to a certain subset of friends.
I don't have a Facebook page, so I guess I've unfriended everyone.

Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:55 pm
by tlynn78
I was hoping for scandalous and controversial, myself.
curses, foiled again.
t.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 2:59 pm
by DevilKitty100
I'm just wondering what my prize is.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:05 pm
by silvercamaro
MarleysGh0st wrote:sunflower wrote:I will also say I am not the first Bored member to unfriend people from the Bored, choosing to keep a Facebook page to a certain subset of friends.
I don't have a Facebook page, so I guess I've unfriended everyone.

Marley, as a fellow nonFacebooker, I am proud you include you among my unfriends.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:06 pm
by DevilKitty100
DevilKitty100 wrote:I'm just wondering what my prize is.
Oh, yeh........and when I'm going to get it.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:09 pm
by DevilKitty100
silvercamaro wrote:MarleysGh0st wrote:sunflower wrote:I will also say I am not the first Bored member to unfriend people from the Bored, choosing to keep a Facebook page to a certain subset of friends.
I don't have a Facebook page, so I guess I've unfriended everyone.

Marley, as a fellow nonFacebooker, I am proud you include you among my unfriends.
I'm an equal opportunity ignorer on FB. I've looked at my page twice in about as many years. My neice finally called me and told me she wanted to share some pix of her kids so I'd better let her on. She's mean that way.......so I did.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:10 pm
by DevilKitty100
Oops......I didn't mean to make this thread about me.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:11 pm
by sunflower
MarleysGh0st wrote:sunflower wrote:I will also say I am not the first Bored member to unfriend people from the Bored, choosing to keep a Facebook page to a certain subset of friends.
I don't have a Facebook page, so I guess I've unfriended everyone.

You are not the person I was referring to. But you know that.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:11 pm
by TheConfessor
I didn't know what to expect when I signed up for Facebook, or how I might eventually want to use it. I'm still no expert, and what I know about it has been learned through trial and error. I have never "defriended" anyone, but I've probably made some bad choices about whom to accept and whom not to. My biggest issue is with the many people whose names I don't recognize who send me friend requests. They almost never include a note of introduction, or an explanation of who the heck they are. Some of them might be people from this board, whose real names are not known to me. Others can sometimes be deduced by comparing which friends we have in common. Some are just total mysteries. I'm currently sitting on about 40 friend requests that I haven't taken the time to figure out who they are or whether they surpass some arbitrary minimum level of friendship. Any perceived slights by or toward me are probably not personal judgments about anyone's value as a human being.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:13 pm
by T_Bone0806
tlynn78 wrote:I was hoping for scandalous and controversial, myself.
Sorry, I just got back. I was at work. You called?
Yeah, I know. I'm about as scandalous and controversial as milk and cookies.
Back in my rock-n-roll days, though...................well, ok, even then it was only
slightly edgier..maybe potato chips and Pepsi.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:13 pm
by peacock2121
So, you un-friended Harv. Big freakin' deal.
I am glad I learned that one could do that.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:16 pm
by PlacentiaSoccerMom
The best part of Facebook is Bejeweled. It's like crack because it's so addicting.
(Disclaimer, I have never used crack, but I hear that crack is addicting.)
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:20 pm
by sunflower
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:The best part of Facebook is Bejeweled. It's like crack because it's so addicting.
(Disclaimer, I have never used crack, but I hear that crack is addicting.)
You would have to bring that up...I cannot even come close to your scores. I just sit there and play over and over again (which you can do a lot, since it's only a minute)...how do you do it?!?!?
It is addicting, and I have also never used crack.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:21 pm
by TheConfessor
PlacentiaSoccerMom wrote:The best part of Facebook is Bejeweled. It's like crack because it's so addicting.
(Disclaimer, I have never used crack, but I hear that crack is addicting.)
And the worst part is having to slog through pages of "news" about your friends' latest scores on "Bejeweled" and dozens of other games and quizzes.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:22 pm
by tlynn78
The best part of Facebook is Bejeweled. It's like crack because it's so addicting.
Bejewelled is as bad as Marblezzz
t.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:26 pm
by SportsFan68
TheConfessor wrote:. . . My biggest issue is with the many people whose names I don't recognize who send me friend requests. They almost never include a note of introduction, or an explanation of who the heck they are. . . .
Guilty! Two people very generously and graciously confirmed me as a friend without knowing who I was, Christie and a local friend. Now I ALWAYS add a note of some kind about where we know each other from.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:27 pm
by ghostjmf
I've received a "so & so wants you to be their Facebook Friend; they already have 40 Friends" request by a robot on behalf of somebody who is my friend in real life. Next time I see them I'll gently let them know "I don't do Facebook". What's scary is how the 'bot got my name, unless my friend just fed their e-mail list into it. Probably exactly what they did.
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:27 pm
by littlebeast13
Damn, I took a nap because I didn't think you'd be around!
lb13
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:28 pm
by peacock2121
littlebeast13 wrote:Damn, I took a nap because I didn't think you'd be around!
lb13
She sure does keep you hopping, huh?
Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:30 pm
by a1mamacat
peacock2121 wrote:littlebeast13 wrote:Damn, I took a nap because I didn't think you'd be around!
lb13
She sure does keep you hopping, huh?
it's fun watching beast being pulled around by his..............
paintbrushes

Re: Yes, I suppose it's about time for me to speak up
Posted: Thu Jul 09, 2009 3:30 pm
by sunflower
ghostjmf wrote:I've received a "so & so wants you to be their Facebook Friend; they already have 40 Friends" request by a robot on behalf of somebody who is my friend in real life. Next time I see them I'll gently let them know "I don't do Facebook". What's scary is how the 'bot got my name, unless my friend just fed their e-mail list into it. Probably exactly what they did.
Yeah, there's a spot where you can enter your friends' email addresses in order to persuade them to join. Once you do it, I believe Facebook automatically sends reminders to those people once a month until they join. So you might want to ask your friend to actually remove your email address from their list, otherwise you'll get those forever.