Random Acts Of Walmart Kindness

[TheConfessor]

Here's an article about a woman in Arkansas who tried to buy $139 worth of groceries at Walmart and learned that the anonymous guy ahead of her in the checkout lane had somehow already paid for her groceries and then disappeared.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29147999/

I'm curious about the logistics and protocol of such a transaction, in case I ever get a notion to try it. How would the guy know that her groceries would cost $139? Did he leave an amount of cash that he was sure would be more than enough? If so, who kept the excess amount? If he had paid with a credit card or a check, his identity would be known, so that's not the answer. How did he know that the woman would accept his gift? Lots of women in bars reject guys' attempts to buy them drinks. I assume the same would be true for groceries. Does the Walmart employee manual cover how to deal with this situation? Once an incident like this gets reported in the news, there's likely to be a rash of copycat anonymous grocery buyers.

[mrkelley23]

If it works like the drivethrough random acts, you give enough to the cashier to cover most normal orders, then tell them to keep the rest. As you surmise, it needs to be cash. At someplace as busy as a WalMart, it would be difficult to maintain anonymity, since there are ALWAYS people in line behind you, but I suppose it still could be done. I can't imagine anyone turning it down, since there's not the implied leer that there is with buying someone a drink in a bar, but if that one turns it down, then the cashier would just hold the money for the next person in line. I guarantee you wouldn't have to go thru many shoppers to find someone ready and willing to accept such a kindness.

[marriedmefliesfree]

"Lots of women in bars reject guys' attempts to buy them drinks."

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

[ulysses5019]

"Lots of women in bars reject guys' attempts to buy them drinks."

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

Soooooo, you're the one......

[marriedmefliesfree]

Soooooo, you're the one......

Hic!...

[SloppyDrunkGuy]

Soooooo, you're the one......

Hic!...

Your place or mine baby? (HIC!, HIC!)

I'lllll.... (HIC!) uh, drive! You'll love the ocean.... (HIC!)

[ulysses5019]

Soooooo, you're the one......

Hic!...

Your place or mine baby? (HIC!, HIC!)

I'lllll.... (HIC!) uh, drive! You'll love the ocean.... (HIC!)

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

[silverscreenselect]

"Lots of women in bars reject guys' attempts to buy them drinks."

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

It goes back a ways, but here's bar hopping SSS style:

1) I would never attempt to buy a woman drinks in a bar. I would, on occasion, offer to share my peanuts with a woman.

2) If I would buy a woman a drink, I wouldn't do so anonymously. I would make sure the waiter announced who it was from and if she didn't show sufficient gratitude such as by inviting me over immediately, I would instruct the waiter to bring the drink back to me.

You can't begin to guess how popular I was with the women.....

[Evil Squirrel]

It goes back a ways, but here's bar hopping SSS style:

1) I would never attempt to buy a woman drinks in a bar. I would, on occasion, offer to share my peanuts with a woman.

I only get slapped about half the time I offer to share my nuts with one of the chicks....

[ulysses5019]

It goes back a ways, but here's bar hopping SSS style:

1) I would never attempt to buy a woman drinks in a bar. I would, on occasion, offer to share my peanuts with a woman.

I only get slapped about half the time I offer to share my nuts with one of the chicks....

You gotta take them out of your mouth first.

[Evil Squirrel]

It goes back a ways, but here's bar hopping SSS style:

1) I would never attempt to buy a woman drinks in a bar. I would, on occasion, offer to share my peanuts with a woman.

I only get slapped about half the time I offer to share my nuts with one of the chicks....

You gotta take them out of your mouth first.

I'll bet my nuts taste better than that roach-kabob you're indulging in.....

[silvercamaro]

You can't begin to guess how popular I was with the women.....

Actually, I can guess....

[BackInTex]

Hic!...

Your place or mine baby? (HIC!, HIC!)

I'lllll.... (HIC!) uh, drive! You'll love the ocean.... (HIC!)

We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

More like "We'll drive off that bridge when we get to it."

[Weyoun]

One time, while I was still in Charlottesville working at a coffee shop on the side, the saxophonist for the Dave Matthews Band came in. He showed up at the place occasionally, buying all sorts of snacks for his kids, the random espresso machine, etc. Anyway, a guy in front of him in line saw him buying this stuff, handed me $50, and told me to tell the saxophonist that someone wanted to thank him for all the things he had done for the city (he helped fund a park, for example), and that he would be shopping for free today. So I told it to him, and, yeah, things like this happen.

[marriedmefliesfree]

Didn't he pass away recently?

[Weyoun]

Actually I am conflating my DMB stories. LeRoi Moore was the saxophonist and yes he died. The guy I am thinking of is the violinist, Boyd Tinsley. I should probably not post while hung over.

[ulysses5019]

Actually I am conflating my DMB stories. LeRoi Moore was the saxophonist and yes he died. The guy I am thinking of is the violinist, Boyd Tinsley. I should probably not post while hung over.

Why not, sloppydrunkguy does.

[marriedmefliesfree]

Hungover posting is still better than drunk posting.

[TheConfessor]

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

Bartender, please send this bottle to the attractive blond pregnant woman over there. Put it on my tab.
http://www.internetwines.com/rws17710.html

[marriedmefliesfree]

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

Bartender, please send this bottle to the attractive blond pregnant woman over there. Put it on my tab.
http://www.internetwines.com/rws17710.html

There's a great SNL skit that I'd love to link to if I can find it....Amy Poehler and her big ol' pregnant belly in a honkey tonk bar. Quite funny.

[marriedmefliesfree]

Btw Confessor....did you bring home any of that Norsk hooch?

[TheConfessor]

Btw Confessor....did you bring home any of that Norsk hooch?

Hey, I thought you said there would be no obligatory conversation! OK, for you I'll make an exception.

Yeah, I had a couple shots of aquavit in Norway, and then I bought two mini bottles of Linie at the Oslo airport's duty free shop when I left, just enough to get rid of my leftover Kroner. When I let friends try a sample at Christmas, they exclaimed that it tasted just like rye bread. I had to agree. Earlier today I went to a local liquor superstore and checked to see if they carry aquavit. They had Linie on the shelves (next to the absinthe) and were temporarily sold out of the cheaper Aalborg brand. So at least I'll know how to show you a good time if you ever have another overnight stop in AUS.

In case I haven't said it, congratulations on the anticipated #2 arrival, and best wishes to your growing family.

[marriedmefliesfree]

Thanks Ed.

I'm pleasantly surprised that your local booze barn sells Linie! We have not seen it on the shelves anywhere in the US. I have seen the Aalborg but never tried it...I think it is a Danish brand. We have too much aquavit on the shelf here at home...we almost always pick up a bottle on the way home from Norway, but obviously haven't been consuming much in the last year and a half!

ETA: whoever made the rye bread comment has a good palate. It's made from rye.

[TheConfessor]

If dudes wanted to anonymously send me drinks and leave before I could offer the obligatory thank you & conversation, I'd accept them all. And run up a tab.

Bartender, please send this bottle to the attractive blond pregnant woman over there. Put it on my tab.
http://www.internetwines.com/rws17710.html

There's a great SNL skit that I'd love to link to if I can find it....Amy Poehler and her big ol' pregnant belly in a honkey tonk bar. Quite funny.

That was the 10/18/08 episode. The video doesn't seem to be easily available online, but here's a transcript and some still photos from that skit.
http://snltranscripts.jt.org/08/08eangel.phtml

I also found a fan forum that purports to have a downloadable version of the video available, split into three large files, at this site:
http://forums.superiorpics.com/ubbthrea ... d/1#import
But that might be more trouble than it's worth.