WWTBAM Bored

Scene: Inside the cybercourtroom of Honorable Robert “Manny” Numbers. Defense Attorney Ulysses is defending Bored Administrator Henry T. Littlebeast, who is accused of stealing the Winter Lyrically Speaking lists from young, nubile Ms. Fantine. Fantine has stated under oath that Littlebeast stole the entire list from her and plans to post them starting January 5th. Prosecuting Attorney Lunatic Nelly looks on. The cyberjury is made up entirely of BBs.




Ulysses: The one thing that bothered me, the one thing that stayed in my mind and I couldn't get rid of it, that haunted me, was why. Why would Ms. Fantine lie? What was her motive for lying? If my client is innocent, she's lying, why? Was it blackmail? No. Was it jealousy? No. Yesterday I found out why. She doesn't have a motive, you know why? Because she's not lying... And ladies and gentlemen of the jury, the prosecution is not going to get that man today, no, because I'm gonna get him! My client, Bored administrator Henry T. Littlebeast, should go right to fu**ing jail! The son of a bitch is guilty!




Ulysses: That man is guilty! That man, there, our very own Littlebeast is a slime! He is cyberslime! If he's allowed to go free, then something really wrong is goin' on here!

Judge Numbers: Mr. Ulysses you are out of order!




Ulysses: You're out of order! You're out of order! The whole Bored is out of order! The BBs are out of order! That man, that sick, crazy, depraved man, stole from that woman there, and he'd like to do it again! He told me so! It's just a game! It's a game! It's "Lyrically Speaking"! "Lyrically Speaking"! Hey, Nelly, you wanna "speak lyrically"? I got an insane Bored administrator who likes to steal ideas and lists from other BBs! How does Jailhouse Rock sound, Nelly?

Lunatic Nelly: Everybody in the whole cell block, was dancin’ to the jailhouse rock!


Ulysses: [to Littlebeast] You, you sonofabitch, you! You're supposed to stand for somethin'! You're supposed to protect your fellow BBs! But instead you steal from them!
[dragged out of court by bailiffs]





Ulysses: You stole the Winter Lyrically Speaking lists! You stole them from Fantine! Hold it! Hold it! I just completed my opening statement!

Great, even in the movies I have to be represented by my usual attorney......

lb13

littlebeast13 wrote:Great, even in the movies I have to be represented by my usual attorney......

lb13

No more than you deserve, you little light-fingered tea leaf, you.....

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:Great, even in the movies I have to be represented by my usual attorney......

lb13

No more than you deserve, you little light-fingered tea leaf, you.....

So are you gonna visit me in jail? Smuggle me in fresh notebooks?

lb13

Posting to see if red Xs turn to pictures


Oh and to say how clever these all are.

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:Great, even in the movies I have to be represented by my usual attorney......

lb13

No more than you deserve, you little light-fingered tea leaf, you.....

So are you gonna visit me in jail? Smuggle me in fresh notebooks?

lb13

Sure, I will........ Just hold your breath until I get there, okay?

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote: No more than you deserve, you little light-fingered tea leaf, you.....

So are you gonna visit me in jail? Smuggle me in fresh notebooks?

lb13

Sure, I will........ Just hold your breath until I get there, okay?

I'll try. It's not like I have anything better to do here....

I'm new here. Is it wise to pick up the soap?

lb13

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:
So are you gonna visit me in jail? Smuggle me in fresh notebooks?

lb13

Sure, I will........ Just hold your breath until I get there, okay?

I'll try. It's not like I have anything better to do here....

I'm new here. Is it wise to pick up the soap?

lb13

Oh, you just brought back a fond Christmas memory. Every year, my Dad would get a soap on a rope from somebody and, every year, he'd make a "don't drop the soap!" joke.

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote: Sure, I will........ Just hold your breath until I get there, okay?

I'll try. It's not like I have anything better to do here....

I'm new here. Is it wise to pick up the soap?

lb13

Oh, you just brought back a fond Christmas memory. Every year, my Dad would get a soap on a rope from somebody and, every year, he'd make a "don't drop the soap!" joke.

Your family may have been even cooler than mine was growing up, and I didn't think that was possible....

You ever get presents stuffed in empty tampon boxes before?

lb13

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:
I'll try. It's not like I have anything better to do here....

I'm new here. Is it wise to pick up the soap?

lb13

Oh, you just brought back a fond Christmas memory. Every year, my Dad would get a soap on a rope from somebody and, every year, he'd make a "don't drop the soap!" joke.

Your family may have been even cooler than mine was growing up, and I didn't think that was possible....

You ever get presents stuffed in empty tampon boxes before?

lb13

Did you ever get tampons stuffed in empty present boxes before?

Should I tell this year's Christmas dinner story in public? Ha!

WheresFanny wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:

WheresFanny wrote: Oh, you just brought back a fond Christmas memory. Every year, my Dad would get a soap on a rope from somebody and, every year, he'd make a "don't drop the soap!" joke.

Your family may have been even cooler than mine was growing up, and I didn't think that was possible....

You ever get presents stuffed in empty tampon boxes before?

lb13

Did you ever get tampons stuffed in empty present boxes before?

Should I tell this year's Christmas dinner story in public? Ha!

No and yes respectively.....

lb13

Just bringing up the images because they make it even funnier.

Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

ulysses5019 wrote:Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

It looks like Hannibal Lecter's jumpsuit....just a bit too tight.

kayrharris wrote:

ulysses5019 wrote:Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

It looks like Hannibal Lecter's jumpsuit....just a bit too tight.

Yup. I spent a little too much time at craft services.

ulysses5019 wrote:Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

I think Louie is the best-dressed lawyer.

silvercamaro wrote:

ulysses5019 wrote:Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

I think Louie is the best-dressed lawyer.

I thought the seersucker suit was all the rage in the courtrooms of America.....

lb13

littlebeast13 wrote:

silvercamaro wrote:

ulysses5019 wrote:Do I get an Oscar for "best dressed lawyer"?

I think Louie is the best-dressed lawyer.

I thought the seersucker suit was all the rage in the courtrooms of America.....

lb13

Hah. Just try to find a seersucker sock!

silvercamaro wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:

silvercamaro wrote: I think Louie is the best-dressed lawyer.

I thought the seersucker suit was all the rage in the courtrooms of America.....

lb13

Hah. Just try to find a seersucker sock!

He looks better in his Flying Monkey Suit, anyway.

silvercamaro wrote:

littlebeast13 wrote:

silvercamaro wrote: I think Louie is the best-dressed lawyer.

I thought the seersucker suit was all the rage in the courtrooms of America.....

lb13

Hah. Just try to find a seersucker sock!

I think ORB probably had some made for his visits to southern clies to check on his plantations.