A present for my parents, a great line from my son
Posted: Tue Dec 23, 2008 12:40 pm
Well, these past couple of months, the project was to improve the headstone on my parents' grave.
For the last two years, I have stared at the small stone over the spot where my father was laid to rest. As most of you know, my Mom left us this past June. So now I'm looking at the place where two of the kindest, most thoughtful and selfless people who ever lived will be forever, and I'm saying to my brother, "this just isn't right. They deserve a much better memorial". Hard to explain. It's not a matter of "Keeping Up With the Joneses", but..well...as I said, they deserved more.
My Mom had told me after my Dad passed that the cemetary PTB informed them that the size of the headstone was determined by the number of plots that were bought, which I found completely ridiculous. Every single stone in their area was a decent size except theirs. My grandparents, great-grandparents, and assorted aunts & uncles are buried there, so it's not like our family is "new to the area".
So my brother and I decided we would "discuss" this matter with the cemetary folks. I was preparig for battle, but my sister-in-law said "May I?" I just started grinning. Y'see, my sister-in-law has a way of persisting with a point until the addressee waves the white flag. As my brother says, it's annoying as hell when the persistence is directed at you, but when it's focused on a common "enemy", you can't help but sit back, pump your fist, and say "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"
They caved in like an avalanche on a Swiss mountain. The new headstone was put in a couple of weeks ago, and it looks mah-velous. One amusing thing..they have a plaque on the back that has Dad as a Korean War vet. While he DID serve in the Navy during that time, the closest thing he got to action was swabbin' the deck. He was stationed off the California coast. We didn't bother correcting the error. I'm sure Dad's up there laughing his rear end off, telling my Mom, "see, you didn't know you were married to a war hero, didja??"
Anyway, we are happy. The new stone is beautiful and much more befitting the caliber of people my folks were. Although, all the time we were making the arrangements, I could hear both of them saying "What the hell are you doing, spending all that money? Save it for yourselves, etc. etc." I ignored the voices.
I told my son about it and he said "You remember how, everytime you tried to give Nana money for something or pay her back for money she lent you, she would refuse to take it? And if you put it where she wouldn't see it until after you left, you'd get that money back in the mail two days later? Well, don't be surprised if you come home tomorrow and find that headstone sitting on your back porch with a note saying 'get your money back'!"
I wouldn't put it past my Mom.
For the last two years, I have stared at the small stone over the spot where my father was laid to rest. As most of you know, my Mom left us this past June. So now I'm looking at the place where two of the kindest, most thoughtful and selfless people who ever lived will be forever, and I'm saying to my brother, "this just isn't right. They deserve a much better memorial". Hard to explain. It's not a matter of "Keeping Up With the Joneses", but..well...as I said, they deserved more.
My Mom had told me after my Dad passed that the cemetary PTB informed them that the size of the headstone was determined by the number of plots that were bought, which I found completely ridiculous. Every single stone in their area was a decent size except theirs. My grandparents, great-grandparents, and assorted aunts & uncles are buried there, so it's not like our family is "new to the area".
So my brother and I decided we would "discuss" this matter with the cemetary folks. I was preparig for battle, but my sister-in-law said "May I?" I just started grinning. Y'see, my sister-in-law has a way of persisting with a point until the addressee waves the white flag. As my brother says, it's annoying as hell when the persistence is directed at you, but when it's focused on a common "enemy", you can't help but sit back, pump your fist, and say "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!"
They caved in like an avalanche on a Swiss mountain. The new headstone was put in a couple of weeks ago, and it looks mah-velous. One amusing thing..they have a plaque on the back that has Dad as a Korean War vet. While he DID serve in the Navy during that time, the closest thing he got to action was swabbin' the deck. He was stationed off the California coast. We didn't bother correcting the error. I'm sure Dad's up there laughing his rear end off, telling my Mom, "see, you didn't know you were married to a war hero, didja??"
Anyway, we are happy. The new stone is beautiful and much more befitting the caliber of people my folks were. Although, all the time we were making the arrangements, I could hear both of them saying "What the hell are you doing, spending all that money? Save it for yourselves, etc. etc." I ignored the voices.
I told my son about it and he said "You remember how, everytime you tried to give Nana money for something or pay her back for money she lent you, she would refuse to take it? And if you put it where she wouldn't see it until after you left, you'd get that money back in the mail two days later? Well, don't be surprised if you come home tomorrow and find that headstone sitting on your back porch with a note saying 'get your money back'!"
I wouldn't put it past my Mom.