Story

The forum for general posting. Come join the madness. :)
Post Reply
Message
Author
User avatar
wintergreen48
Posts: 2481
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2007 1:42 pm
Location: Resting comfortably in my comfy chair

Story

#1 Post by wintergreen48 » Tue Jul 01, 2008 3:56 pm

The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Have your parents tell you a story with a moral at the end.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

'Johnny, do you have a story to share?'

'Yes ma'am.

'My daddy told a story about my Aunt Carol.

'She was a pilot in Desert Storm and her plane got hit.

'She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a small flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife.

'She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then her parachute landed right in the middle of twenty enemy troops.

'She shot fifteen of them with the gun until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last with her bare hands.'

'Good Heavens' said the horrified teacher, 'what kind of moral did your daddy tell you from this horrible story?'

'Stay the *%$# away from Aunt Carol when she's drinking.'

User avatar
tlynn78
Posts: 9452
Joined: Tue Oct 09, 2007 9:31 am
Location: Montana

#2 Post by tlynn78 » Tue Jul 01, 2008 4:27 pm

love it!

t.
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. -Thomas Paine
You can ignore reality, but you can't ignore the consequences of ignoring reality. -Ayn Rand
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. -Voltaire

wbtravis007
Posts: 1594
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 12:15 pm
Location: Skipperville, Tx.

Re: Story

#3 Post by wbtravis007 » Tue Jul 01, 2008 11:12 pm

wintergreen48 wrote:The teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment: Have your parents tell you a story with a moral at the end.

The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.

'Johnny, do you have a story to share?'

'Yes ma'am.

'My daddy told a story about my Aunt Carol.

'She was a pilot in Desert Storm and her plane got hit.

'She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a small flask of whiskey, a pistol and a survival knife.

'She drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't break and then her parachute landed right in the middle of twenty enemy troops.

'She shot fifteen of them with the gun until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last with her bare hands.'

'Good Heavens' said the horrified teacher, 'what kind of moral did your daddy tell you from this horrible story?'

'Stay the *%$# away from Aunt Carol when she's drinking.'
I don't know whether I should ICM! this or just say: Rec!

Either way.

User avatar
ne1410s
Posts: 2961
Joined: Mon Oct 08, 2007 5:26 pm
Location: The Friendly Confines

#4 Post by ne1410s » Wed Jul 02, 2008 12:13 pm

The hypnotist was entertaining at the nursing home. He took out his gold watch and said to closely follow its motion. You are now completely under my control. He dropped the watch which flew into hundreds of pieces. "Well, shit", he exclaimed!

It took three days to clean up the rec room.
"When you argue with a fool, there are two fools in the argument."

Post Reply