Western Rape Culture-It's Not Just For Girls Anymore

[Spock]

SSS in the other thread>>>There are a lot of non-Muslim people in this country who believe that just because a woman dresses provocatively, she's asking for it. Or that if a woman has a few drinks with you, she's asking for it. Or that if a woman starts to fool around with you and then says no and tries to get away, she's asking for it.<<<<

SSS posted this in the other thread-but I don't want my response there.

It might surprise some, but in 1986, when I was 19, I was very nearly the victim of sexual assault by a male in a classic "College-Style" sexual assault.

A bunch of us went to small-town bar, about 100 miles away, because we knew some people there. My first time there, we were laughingly warned to watch out for the bartender. He liked to bring drunk guys to his house and feel them up. Thankfully, I don't know if he went beyond that.

I got absolutely stone-drunk and as the evening drew to a close, he became very "Helpful." He wanted me to come to his house to sleep it off. His behavior was classic. He separated me from my group and isolated me in a back-room, prior to bringing me to his house.

Somewhere in the deep, dark recesses of my very drunk brain-I remembered the warnings about him and knew I needed to get out of there. I staggered out to the street where my friends found me. I think we laughed some about how the bartender just about got me-but it could have turned out very bad.

[silverscreenselect]

I'm glad you opened another thread for this. This is no joking matter or something to turn into one of our Bored debates.

I'm sorry for what happened to you and I'm glad you got through it without anything worse happening. It happened in my family as well (and that's all I'll say about it). No one should have that happen to them.

[Bob78164]

I'm very sorry you had this experience and I'm glad it wasn't worse. I'm also glad that we're becoming a society where such disclosures are greeted with more acceptance than when I was younger. --Bob

[BackInTex]

I never had that experience, at least from an adult. I did have a lifelong friend, he was my age, and I think we were about 12, politely ask one day while we were walking in the woods if he could "play" with me. I said, "Hey, look at that tree! Let's go climb it." And I ran off. He never brought it up again. I never mentioned it. I'm pretty sure he lived his life as a celibate gay man. He was fairly religious and that may be why. He could have had partners but he never brought them home or anywhere we were together. Last I communicated with him he lived in Dallas and was recovering from either prostate or testicular cancer. That was 5 years ago or so, a year after we did see each other at his mother's funeral. I should try to reach out to him.

My brother was raped, at 12 or 13 years of age. I didn't find out about it until he was 20 or so (I'm 4 years older), a year or two after the SOB, an old schoolmate of mine, that raped him had died of AIDS.